The Only Way Is Elegance

November 17, 2011 / Posted by:

If the lady behind you is not preparing her nostrils for the scented current of snatch that is about to blow her way, then you’re working the red carpet wrong. This is Lauren Pope, of the British reality mess The Only Way Is Essex, at last night’s London premiere of Twatlight: Breaking Hymens, Part 1.

For those refined ladies out there who want to look like their body is luxuriating in expensive glamour but don’t have the budget for it, take an economical styling tip from Lauren Pope. Sneak into your local brothel, rip two satin curtain panels from their rods, slap one on each side of your body, cinch it together with a luggage belt around your waist and BAM! Lauren calls it “The Scarlett O’Whorah.” You don’t even need double-sided tape to keep your dress from flying up and exposing the goods for free. Just do what Lauren did and dab a little of your natural coochie glue on your thigh.

Not wearing panties will tell the world that you’ve got a resilient pussy that can handle the elements and your labia lips flapping in the night wind will provide a romantic soundtrack. This ensemble is everything. Thank you, Lauren.

Lauren is the only Pope we should be worshiping.

Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >