Category: Tell Me It’s Not True

It’s The End Of A Roadkill Wig Era

January 28, 2019 / Posted by:

The next time you’re driving along and spot a poor dead raccoon on the side of the road, you can no longer assume that Sea Org minions from Scientology will soon be by to scoop the creature up and give it a new home on top of John Travolta’s head. Because John Travolta made a devastating announcement that knocked the lace front right off of my dome. John says that he’s embracing his new bald head, which means he’s done with lace fronts for now, which means two sad things are happening: 1. His skinned-dog wigs are now all lonely in his wig closet. 2. The Thetans on top of his head are screaming for a parka because they’re cold as wet shit.

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