Open Post: Hosted By A “Mannequin Lamp” At Baggage Claim In London

August 8, 2021 / Posted by:

Whenever I’m at baggage claim, the most interesting thing that happens is when some Type-A dude in a business suit screeches into his phone that all the black luggage looks exactly the same, and he can’t find his own bags in time to make his business meeting at the hotel. Boring! But according to ViralHog, whoever happened to be skulking around the airport in London (whether Heathrow or Gatwick isn’t stated) one fine day in November 2017, was treated to some boredom-busting carousel fuckery in the shape of a human body that the unnamed owner claims is a mannequin lamp. Uh HUH.

via ViralHog:

“I was travelling back from Scotland with a mannequin lamp I had purchased. I had a lot of fun watching people’s faces as I collected it on the carousel when I landed.”

At that point in time, I might have guessed the body in question had belonged to Lindsay Lohan going method and showing her role versatility in her desperation to star in the then-upcoming cinematic masterpiece, Life-Size 2, to follow her Oscar-losing shock of a performance in its predecessor. It wouldn’t have been the first time she was tied up like that and waiting to get taken home in some rando’s trunk. It might have also crossed some passengers’ minds that maybe a priceless museum mummy had been stolen, but after a long flight and dealing with security, no one really gave a fuck and just let it get banged around on the bumpy conveyer belt so they could finally go home.

Here’s the baggage-claim footage, but it took the owner four years to come up with the shoddy “mannequin lamp” explanation before uploading this clip, so it was either a life-size sex doll or it really was Lindsay Lohan trying to avoid paying the full fare.

Pic:  YouTube/ViralHog

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