Open Labor Day Post: Hosted By Two Chunky Pool-Floating Raccoons

September 4, 2017 / Posted by:

It’s Labor Day, that magical day of the year where you either kick back and relax or you realize summer is pretty much over, freak out, and try to cram in as much summertime fun as possible in 24 hours before you’re forced to return back to reality. Whatever you choose to do, I think we can all relate to these raccoon brothers who spent their last days of summer floating like fat little roly-poly bags of fur in a swimming pool.

Tastefully Offensive points us to this video of pet raccoon brothers Waylon and Willie from Orange Park, Florida. Waylon and Willie won the raccoon lottery; they were adopted by a human with a swimming pool, and it appears they’re well-fed. No digging through the dumpster behind Krystal for them! Waylon and Willie are no doubt spending their Labor Day in the pool. Come to think of it, I’m spending my Labor Day in a similar way! Except instead of a pool, I’m in a river way up in Northern Ontario. Instead of fat raccoon buoyancy, I’m floating on a gut full of hot dogs and corn. And instead of paddling around a pool floatie, I’m furiously struggle swimming away from this one snapping turtle that’s got my number (seriously, pray 4 my toes).

The only way Waylon and Willie have got me beat is that they’ve got a nice old man to help them in and out of the water. I bet that nice old man also gives them little poolside back massages while they sip non-alcoholic sparkling raccoon wine. Keep living that spoiled raccoon life, Waylon and Willie! And to all the humans, Happy Labor Day!

Pic: YouTube

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