Who Worked It Better?

January 11, 2016 / Posted by:

On the left is Cate Blanchett at the Golden Globes last night and on the right is the pink fringed lamp a 19th century bordello madam bought for her baby daughter’s nursery.

It feels like almost every awards show red carpet is a parade of blah ass dresses. Every celebrity type is so scared of getting dragged for looking a wreck that they play it safe by wearing prom hair and sleep-inducing dresses that Ambien would design if Ambien was a fashion designer. So when Cate Blanchett sashayed onto the red carpet last night, she was a breath of fresh fuckery and a vision in pink messiness. This is an exquisite disaster from the top of her Edward Scissorhands-made hairdo to the bottom of her “fortune teller in Candy Land” ensemble.

It looks like the 1980s section of Dolly Parton’s closet blew chunks all over Cate Blanchett. The way those lace cutouts are framing her crotch is a beautifully delicate touch. That dress is like the broken condom baby of a grandma’s negligee and the fringed curtain at a strip club called “The Dollhouse.” Cate’s fringe probably got caught on all kinds of shit last night, but I bet she saw that coming. Cate did her hair up in a pinned bob, because she needed a place to store a pair of scissors for when she needs to cut her dress free. Bitch came prepared.

I haven’t checked, but I’m sure Cate’s look made every Worst Dressed List, because hos just don’t have a taste for gorgeous foolery. But thank you, Cate. Thank you for being one of the only tricks to bring the messiness.

Pics: Splash, Wenn.com, Lampshademaker.com

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