Open Post: Hosted By Hilary Duff’s Tinder Commercial/Music Video

May 14, 2015 / Posted by:

Remember how Hilary Duff drooled at the mouth about how she’s on Tinder now and there was a rumor that she was filming her dates for a reality show? Well, she filmed her Tinder dates, but she didn’t film them for some reality shit show. Hilary filmed her Tinder dates for the music video for her single “Sparks.” Dear Katy Perry and Brit Brit, please immediately report to the conference room at the Best Western in Sherman Oaks for a Learning Annex class titled “How To Shamelessly Turn Your Music Video Into A Giant Fucking Ad Without Giving A Shit By Hilary Duff.”  Hilary Duff has taken product placement in a music video to embarrassing levels of MESS.

Hilary Duff was whoring out Tinder like she was a majority shareholder in that company. She was selling Tinder like her rent was due yesterday and she got a dollar for every time she said the name Tinder. Now we know why. Most of the pop tricks out there sneak the product placement into their videos, but not Hilary. Hilary sneaks the video into her product placement ads. The video for “Sparks” is a blatant Tinder ad spliced with scenes of her hopping around while looking like a humanized My Little Pony on what looks like the set for a really low-budget bootleg Almodovar movie from the 80s. Get ready to swipe left:

On a positive note: That video looks more like a trailer for a Jem and the Holograms movie than the trailer for Jem and the Holograms does.

Hilary yanked a million dicks when she told Entertainment Weekly that her video is not an ad for Tinder.

“I thought it would be really cool to capture me doing something totally normal that a ton of people do and include it in the video—it’s two parts of my life that are meshing together. And [it] seemed challenging for me—I was like, ‘Am I really going to go on a date with someone I’ve never met before or heard about?’ I wanted to know what it was like and if sparks really do happen. The theme of my song is sparks. It’s about finding that with someone and then hanging onto it.”

Translation: “My video is about finding a company to pay for your video when your record label doesn’t want to.” Bow down to the Queen of Product Placement!

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