Open Post: Hosted By Gina Gershon As Donatella Versace

Maya Rudolph, Janice the Muppet and a strip of salmon jerky with a blond weave stuck to it weren’t available to play Donatella Versace in the Lifetime movie House of Versace, so they asked Gina Gershon (aka forever Cristal Connors from Showgirls to me) to do it since she practically played Donatella Versace in Ugly Betty. Lifetime describes the future Emmy sweeper, which airs on October 8th, like this:

The telepic is based on Wall Street Journal reporter Deborah Ball’s book House of Versace: The Untold Story of Genius, Murder, and Survival and centers on Donatella (Gershon), who after her brother’s slaying is thrust into the spotlight as head designer of his fashion empire. At first ridiculed by critics worldwide, Donatella falls victim to drug addiction and nearly bankrupts the company. With the help of her family, including daughter Allegra, Aunt Lucia (Raquel Welch) and brother Santo (Colm Feore), she enters rehab to confront her demons and soon comes back stronger than ever to reignite the beloved Versace brand with her own vision and builds one of the most powerful and influential fashion houses ever known.

RAQUEL WELCH AS HER AUNT?! Why the hell isn’t this headlining the Venice Film Festival and all the other film festivals? If Lifetime really knows how to fart out magic, there will be a scene in this mess where Donatella runs into Elizabeth Berkley as Nomi Malone and Nomi says to her, “I love your work, Ms. Versayce.”