Lindsay Lohan On Her Messy First Performance Of Speed-The-Plow: “It Could’ve Been A Disaster. I Could’ve Not Shown Up.”

September 28, 2014 / Posted by:

Seen above getting the lenses of the paparazzi’s cameras second hand high by blowing a kiss at ’em after leaving the Playhouse Theater in London last night, Lindsay Lohan talked to The Mirror about her first performance of Speed-The-Plow that some say was a disaster because she didn’t know her lines and the audience laughed at her ass. LiLo says that the negative shit hos say about her bounces off of her freckled zombie skin and she doesn’t care what the haters think. The haters can eat it, because LiLo ran into Al Pacino at a hotel recently and he told her he was proud of her for doing theater. Yeah, she probably didn’t run into THEE Al Pacino, she ran into some random dude who happens to be named Al Pacino. And he didn’t tell her he was proud of her for doing for theater, he asked her what her hourly rate is, but STILL.

LiLo said that the first night wasn’t a train wreck at all and it could’ve been a whole lot worse:

On how she’s patting herself on the taint for actually showing up to her job: “It could’ve been a disaster – but it wasn’t by far. I could’ve not shown up. But of course I did, it’s my show. Everyone is always going to be judgmental, no matter what. I respect people have an opinion, but I’m doing the best I can and will for the duration. I’m doing this because working makes me feel happy and this is a new venture for me.”

On how theater acting is her new crack: “I was nervous on the first night because I’d never done it before. But everyone has been really great. I love the stage manager…they’ve all been kind, gracious and comforting. Every night feels more natural and comfortable. I’m not used to a live audience, it’s a much quicker buzz.”

“I’m not used to a live audience.” Oh, LiLo, please don’t be that kind of snob who denies her Tijuana donkey show roots.

If LiLo didn’t show up and had to be replaced with a dirty mop with red rubber lips glued to its handle, some people in the audience might’ve considered that a major upgrade. I was going to side-eye LiLo for saying, “MY SHOW,” but the director, stage manager, crew and other cast members probably aren’t bothered by that at all. Let LiLo take full credit for that turd.

Pics: Wenn.com, Splash

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