Earlier this year, “random” was redefined when pictures came out of Robin Wright lovingly popping a zit on Ben Foster’s forehead (that’s what she was doing, right?) in the middle of a restaurant in Australia. And here they are 10 months later, walking arm-in-arm in a parking lot after shopping at Fred Segal in Santa Monica, CA yesterday. So basically, this Christmas, Robin Wright gets to sit and spin on Ben Foster and as for Sean Penn….
In a South American hotel room, a high-priced pussy peddler is trying to contain her eye roll while a sweaty and naked Sean Penn lies in the fetal position in her arms and snorts out coke boogers while bawling about how nobody has ever truly loved him before. Grease and scalp cheese gets between her fingers as she strokes his oily mop and tries to shut his annoying ass up by letting out a quiet “shhhhh” every now and again. Earlier in the night when Sean munched her butt in between shouting, “Tell your comrade you love it, Hugo. Tell your comrade!“, she thought that would be the worst part of their date, but she was wrong. Bitch is not getting paid enough to listen to Sean Penn’s whining. Her Christmas is totally ruined.