What In The Craft Project Hell.....
England's finest rose is a beacon of understated elegance from her "Raggedy Ann after a $2 blowout" weave to her Spalding-made titty balls to her Bad-era Michael Jackson tattoo and all the way down to her graceful hooves. And Jodie Marsh's precious feet only deserve the best, which is why she slipped them into a pair of exquisitely crafted heels that are so delicate they make Cinderella's lucite slippers look like some knock-off CROCs from Payless. Don't let anybody tell you that you can't achieve high levels of luxury with a hot glue gun, a can of gold spray paint, a couple of dead crows, a string of black Cheerios anal beads and some shit you stole from a 5th grader's diorama project on Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
But seriously, what is that dark-sided shit on Jodie's feets? Those aren't shoes, they're a traveling black magic witch ceremony. I see those chicken feet voodoo dolls. Everyone around her got the heaves and they figured it was from looking at the fugness on her feet. But no, with every step Jodie took, she cast a black magic curse on them. Cleanse the blasphemy from your monitor screen with a holy water wipe.
Jodie is usually the epitome of sophistication, so we shouldn't hold this one fuck-up against her. Jodie made it up to us later when she went on ITV1's This Morning and told them that she recently honored her late grandma in a very special way:
“I had her ashes crushed up into the ink and tattooed in to me and I feel like she’s with me forever now.”
Here I was thinking that the best way to honor your grandma is by having her ashes turned into a diamond nipple ring. Leave it to Jodie Marsh to show us how a classy tribute is really done.
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MK, these shoes can be YOURS! We should all chip in a dollar.
♥ The Dark Side of Jodie Marsh NEW
Evil Couture made for celebrity Jodie Marsh. Though your own version can be created. A darkly tantilising shoe that infuses hand made birds' nests, feathering, hand painted and moulded gold leaf eggs and taxidermy. Not for the faint hearted. Please remember that no birds were killed in order to solely produce these shoes. Feathers and crow's feet supplied by a registered taxideremist.
Price: £500.00
http://www.millyjshoes.co.uk/default.html
Gah.
Damn that write-up made me laugh so fucking hard! Why isn't MK like 200 times more famous? He is seriously the funniest person on the whole entire internet. The belly laughs MK serves up on this site can prolly help cure cancer or something. What an awesome guy.
To me ALL shoes look as bad as these. I never understand how women can LOVE shoes.
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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That hair. She couldn't wash it??? I was actually grooving with the shoes until I looked at her hair. Can't.
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"Discussions about what is good, beautiful, noble, pure, true, could always go on. Why is that important? Because that is the only conversation worth having." C.Hitchens,1949-2011. (RIP MCA, "no sleep til Brooklyn") *caprica six was/is here*
Tell me again - who is this person?
The world: "Hey lady, you're a freak! Where the hell do you come from?"
Jodie Marsh: "Why, from whore island, of course. Didn't you know?"
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"Dammit, Pam, I've seen that, and now I can't unsee it. There's not enough liquor or therapy in the world to help me forget that..." - Archer
Gawd awful project gone wrong.
Like many of us, Jodie Marsh still lives on the Boulevard of broken dreams, somewhere in between hope and despair. Might as well go for broke!
I'm curious to see what Courtney Stodden will be wearing for the Fourth!
Anything for attention.
I think her shoes are by Milly J:
http://www.millyjshoes.co.uk/Milly-J-s-Picture-Gallery.html
The Milly J ones i have seen tended to be nicer than Jodie's birds nest ones.
somebody got a new hot glue gun!
I love the hair and dress also. Good look for her. I always wanted to look like a suicide girl, but employent always stops me. Plus, I worry about the men I would attract.
Aww I don't know, she seems like a nice person who's just trying to figure things out to me. I admire her resolve to survive I guess *shrug*
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 07/03/2012 - 4:08pm.
I know this sounds stupid but as a Canadian and as someone that plays hockey even as a kid you learned if you're getting harassed on the ice you took that fucker out and you take him out hard so he thinks twice about taking a run at you, that carries on in real life. Bullies are just that, they will think twice if they know there is going to be pain that goes with the taunts.
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It's field hockey, which carries different physical risks. It may not have been bullying - it could well have been an accident.
I played a lot as a teenager (less so now - goddamn adult responsibilities) and got quite a few balls smashed into my legs. My best friend (no, really) once smashed a ball into my ribs. Yes, it hurt.
It could have been a ball gone astray. She could have gone in too low for a tackle and got a stick in the face. (I read of a semi pro who did that some years back - it ended his top end career.) She could have gotten into a fight. There are a lot of possibilities.
I understand your point, but accidents can happen, particularly at an age when the players are still learning ball control.
The rest of her is a total trainwreck but I actually love her dress. But my personal style leans toward Peg Bundy anyway.
@ Whamo
For real! It was broken, and when she went for the nosejob to fix it she requested the Pamela Anderson. I remember her saying this in an interview when she first began her career in famewhoring. IIRC, she was 16 when she had it done - not that that's any excuse.
I know you all hate Lady Gaga but I think you'd have to admit that this chick WISHES she had some Lady Gaga shoes. Seriously these make those UGLY pearl Kanye West designed look like a practical alternative.
http://burning-plastic.tumblr.com/
You can find shoes better than that on Etsy at probably about half the price she paid.
Submitted by Lisbet459 on Tue, 07/03/2012 - 1:51pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 07/03/2012 - 12:44pm.
What in the Micheal Jackson hell is going on with her nose?
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I read that she got her nose broken by a bully when she was a teenager.
ETA: No, wait. My mistake. She actually broke it at the age of 8 in a hockey match:
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I know this sounds stupid but as a Canadian and as someone that plays hockey even as a kid you learned if you're getting harassed on the ice you took that fucker out and you take him out hard so he thinks twice about taking a run at you, that carries on in real life. Bullies are just that, they will think twice if they know there is going to be pain that goes with the taunts.
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Tue, 07/03/2012 - 1:12pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 07/03/2012 - 12:44pm.
What in the Micheal Jackson hell is going on with her nose?
She went to the plastic surgeon with a photo of Pamela Anderson and came out with that thing.
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I don't want to sound foolish but...really or are you just joking :)?
Paps still want to take her picture so everything must be aokay.
I've been asked this a few times in my 7 yrs of tattooing, and pretty much every other artist I've known or worked with has also been asked to do this. Not just for family members, but dead pets or even miscarried babies. There are artists who would do anything, and before mechanical tattooing rubbing charcoal ashes into skin cuttings was one of the easiest and most common ways ancient people would mark themselves, but I have never actually known an artist who said "yes" to this request before and I know I never will... the tattoo ink we use today is sterile (until it's opened, but even then you'll notice any good artist goes to lengths to make sure their bottles of ink are handled with clean paper towels and gloves and are never opened more than the few seconds it takes to get what you need), and I feel adding a foreign element into it would not only give you the reputation as someone who would be okay with doing something sort of groddy, but could possibly cause an infection.
I'd also like to add that tattoo looks FAR from 'recent', it has the worn, spread-under-the-skin look that it usually takes years for a tattoo achieve, but it's more likely the unhealthy amount of tanning she's exposed it too. THAT is why we ask you to put sunscreen on your tattoos, the sun damage makes them looks like hell.
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I think the biggest oddity here is the fact that she had her grandmother's ashes crushed into her tattoo ink.
[slow hand claps]
Now that's fucking class.
Her sleeve tattoo looks like my junk drawer, except I don't have Buddy Holly or whoever that's supposed to be in it. Otherwise, nailed it.
MichaelK would LOVE her tranny alter ego; Jodie Harsh. Dont know how to link a pic of her???
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Certified Slore
Well if dressing up like a clown works for other ho's, why not for Jodie too?! But how does she change her look to/from extreme bodybuilder from one day to the other? HOW?
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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cock fighting shoes
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♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Those Whoreinous shoes are the least infuriating thing about this bitch.
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I want you to get on them fat chubby knees and take muh manhood in to your sugarwalls!-Early Cuyler -Squidbillies-
Longtime Lurker here. My little brother died by suicide at 18. There was no goodbye, there was no service, there was no "closure." My straightlaced parents nor I had any tattoos prior but got them together with his ashes mixed in the ink. It helped me cope to have him a part of me and I have never regretted or been ashamed of it. I am neither sick or macabre. To hear the idea described as classless offended me. Please keep in mind not everyone wants to spread their loved ones ashes and we all deal with death differently. I know for sure my brother would have found it as far from disrespectful as can be; he would've been honored.
That said, please note my tattoo design is a work of art compared to this crap she's rocking. The rest of the pics are fail as well. *ends PSA and slinks back into lurkdom*
Longtime lurker, here. My little brother died by suicide at 18. I did not get to say goodbye and there was no memorial for "closure." My straightlaced parents nor I had any tattoos prior but all got them together with my brother's ashes in the ink. I am not sick or macabre; it was something that bonded us and I have never once regretted or been embarrassed by my decision. To hear the concept described as classless offended me.
I felt the need to say this because not everyone wants to spread their loved one's ashes, as we all cope differently. I know my brother would have been cool with us doing it.
Please note my tattoo is worlds better than her travesty. Everything else about these pictures is fail. *ends PSA and slinks back into lurkdom*
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 07/03/2012 - 12:44pm.
What in the Micheal Jackson hell is going on with her nose?
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I read that she got her nose broken by a bully when she was a teenager.
ETA: No, wait. My mistake. She actually broke it at the age of 8 in a hockey match:
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/tv/4079419/Jodie-Marsh-news...
Get a job at Wimpies, already!
She has a clothes pin tattoo?! After looking at those pics I had to relax my face. It was grimacing involuntarily. A clothes pin??
Oh God. I didn't even notice the amputated bird feet in the one nest. That is horrific.
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"You will drink the black sperm of my vengeance!" Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
She is a mess as usual. Speaking of shoes... The designer shoes are out of control, too. $1,000 and up for a pair of shoes that you can barely walk in.
(973) Jersey Strong
I don't know, I would much rather spend an hour with her than a minute with that piece of piss Katie"name your" Price
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Certified Slore
I would be livid if I knew my grandchild did this with my ashes. Although I'd be dead so it wouldn't matter.
I think the biggest oddity here is the fact that she had her grandmother's ashes crushed into her tattoo ink.
I know many people have their own ideas about mourning their loved ones that have passed on. However, that is a bit strange. I would also think that better ways could be utilized - spreading ashes in a sacred place, etc.
Horrific from head to toe
Yuck. Everything about this trainwreck looks filthy, smelly, greasy, frazzled, low-rent and desperate.
I could see the Olsens wearing those fug shoes while riding on the roadkill pick up of CT.
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Don't blame me! I voted for Kodos!
http://lif3d3sign.tumblr.com/
Say something nice: She looks way better here than she did in the bodybuilding photo. Still pretty HOrrific, though.
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Douchechill!
She sure has been thru a lot.
I need open post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Don't blame me! I voted for Kodos!
http://lif3d3sign.tumblr.com/
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 07/03/2012 - 12:44pm.
What in the Micheal Jackson hell is going on with her nose?
She went to the plastic surgeon with a photo of Pamela Anderson and came out with that thing.
Submitted by MahatMaCoat on Tue, 07/03/2012 - 12:42pm.
I think she is smarter than she looks
That would put her IQ at around 5.
I don't know why but I kinda like Jodie.
Unlike KimK who got peed on and expects everyones respect Jodie works for the $$$$$.
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What the fuck dude? And being European is NOT an excuse. - IHateCharityChic 05/10/2012
Dammit, where are those zombies already? Apocalypse, come!!!
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"When in doubt, freak 'em out" -- Sharon Needles
The 'shoes' look like she stuck her feet up the holes of some blackbirds. Disgusting maggot infested rat fanny of a woman.
I do Pagents!