Michael Lohan Got Hit By A Bus
And to answer your first question, the bus is fine.
Normally when you read about someone getting hit by a bus, you hope that everybody involved is okay. But when you read about Michael Lohan getting hit by a bus, you just have to bust out a: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Don't worry, Michael Lohan didn't get hurt or die. If he did, I'd have a few less HAs in there, okay? I'm not totally a freeze dried cunt.
TMZ reports that an L.A. metro bus wished Michael Lohan an early Father's Day by smashing into his Jaguar yesterday afternoon. Apparently, the bus tried to pass Michael Lohan at a stoplight and sideswiped his car. Nobody was injured and Michael's Jaguar barely has a few scratches on it
Michael Lohan gets hit by a bus, Lindsay Lohan regularly gets a train ran on her... I swear, the Lohans and public transportation ...
But seriously, finally, years of White Oprah reenacting the "Regina George gets mowed over by a speeding bus" scene with a Michael Lohan voodoo doll (made from the dehydrated carcass of a sea turtle) have finally paid off! I am skeptical, though. If a fame whore gets hit by a bus in the middle of Hollywood and a paparazzo isn't there to capture it, did it really happen?
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ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha @ MK!
He does look like a dehydrated sea turtle especially when he wears a turtleneck sweater.
How can that mofo afford a Jag? Celeb Rehab must pay very well.
So who's to blame for this accidents after all? He seems pretty upset by the incident, I wonder if he got a ticket? Well, these episodes can be quite troubling no mater who you are, I should know, I got my share of NYC traffic ticket episodes...
To answer your question Michael, 'No', and it didn't make a sound either.
I used to tan the dude on the right.
HAHAHAAAA how did I miss this little news gift?! Boo on the bus for having shitty aim!
~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♥~♦¤♦~♥~
FANTA FANTA, NO COKE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lnRDU4LdZE
@i'm a brat
no, but you can do something about those festering STD blisters that currently live around your mouth...
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"The world is a pretty nice place if you're happy"
John Garfield
No one lives forever
Can't we sue somebody?
Submitted by Luvs2tango on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 3:05pm.
Back in 1969, my hubbie ordered from the factory in Coventry, England, in cash, a brand new, 1969 XKE hardtop Jag, to be shipped to the states to sit in my mother's garage in Costa Mesa, CA, while we remained overseas. Black with red interior.
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My ex-boyfriend in LA had a 1975 Jag XJS. That thing spent more time in the shop than being driven. I drove him around in my 1989 Ford Festiva. Memories.
The whole Lohan clan needs to get hit by a bus.
Americans start the craziest lawsuits sometimes. Can't the people sue the bus company for having functional breaks? There is such a thing as public responsibility, and if I were an LA citizen I would claim that my basic right - the right to a ML-free world - was seriously violated in this case.
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Who are you calling silly cow?
The suit he's wearing is very expensive and yes this is clearly a publicity photo:A VERY BAD AND OBVIOUS ONE THAT IS! that said this family has got to be the foulest pieces of white trash that have ever walked the face of this here planet earth. UH!
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"The world is a pretty nice place if you're happy"
John Garfield
No one lives forever
That pic looks like a publicity shot for the porno version of Blue Bloods.
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GERONIMO!
ML's wardrobe is so late 80's, early 90's.
Is this a look he embraces, or perhaps he has no clue?
Or maybe everyone from Long Island dresses this way, I'm gonna go with that.
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GERONIMO!
When I first heard about this, I was praying he was under the bus and would stay there forever.
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GERONIMO!
I'd like to see a Who Wore It Better between Lohan and Santana in black mesh. Then Lohan and me with cell phones clipped to our belts.
MiLo needs a beating and to be tasered. Those might teach him a lesson he's yet to learn.
Submitted by Mrs. Voorhees on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 7:23pm.
*whispers*
would do him.
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*throws Holy Water on Mrs. Voorhees*
"let go of this poor soul, you evil demons"
"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
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http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
The belt attachment is full of condoms.
A chick magnet has to be prepared.
*whispers*
would do him.
*sends bottle of Champers to the bus driver*
Please lord of the universe or goddess of infinity please please please vaporize this clan of pikey gyppo travellers, please
Please lord of the universe or goddess of infinity please please please vaporize this clan of pikey gyppos travellers, please
I read the title and burst out loud into laughter. What does he do again? I don't care what Jags cost - I didn't know he had the income to afford a $40k car.
Who wants to bet by this time next week we'll hear that he is suing the driver?
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Yeah, Fuck it.
Submitted by Hekki on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 3:42pm.
Wrong Lohan, God. But we appreciate the effort.
Jaguars are ugly as shit these days. I loved the ones in the 80s. Used to be, you could tell a Saab from a BMW from a Mercedes. Now they all look like Lexuses (Lexii?) Instead of being distinct, they all have the same profile and it pisses me off. How can this happen? Luxury cars all look the same, why bother buying one? Might as well get your money's worth with a Honda Civic or a Subaru outback.
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I hear they are notoriously unreliable, too. My old boss had a Jag and it was in the shop all the time with some problem or another.
How on earth does this idiot have the money to get a jag, anyway? His estranged daughter is broke and I'm pretty sure he's already frittered away the family fortune on hookers, blow and booze. I bet he owes the IRS bigtime too.
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
Submitted by Bjork You on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 5:10pm.
And what kind of bracelet is he wearing?
It holds back his foreskin.
Submitted by RustyHooligan: "Court!"
Slaps forhead! How could I forget that one. (And what kind of bracelet is he wearing? It looks that spirally rubber kind that holds a key or two. Or maybe its his cock ring?)
Submitted by Bjork You on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 4:52pm.
Michael Lohan is wearing a suit.
Court!
@ SFRB
We have become like ships passing in the night! I never see you around anymore :(
The bus driver should've gotten arrested on the spot for having shitty aim and not getting the job done.
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""There is no chicken or egg. It's molecular." - Lady Gaga
Michael Lohan is wearing a suit. I'm assuming that either he's on his way to work because he got a job (one that requires a bodyguard [who is that guy behind him?]), he's going to a funeral (which still requires a bodyguard?), or he's wearing a suit on loan from Warehouse for Men, and the guy behind him is a store employee sent to guard Lohan to ensure that the suit is returned and not sold for coke.
Exactly what does Michael Lohan do for a living (besides sell stories about his daughter to the tabloids, that is)? Are "grifter" or "scam artist" official jobs these days?
I simply can't picture this nimrod working for the type of company that would have things like, oh say....corporate offices, policies and procedures, group insurance benefits, etc, etc, and of course, etc. I see him more in some sort of collection field. You know, where he goes out and threatens some goomer with broken legs if he doesn't pay up by midnight.
Sonne -- thanks, sweetie, but I didn't get taken advantage of by the tinkers in the large house, just some assholes I've met along the way, a few in the guise of being my friend. The tinkers lived about 4 blocks away from me, far enough away that I didn't have to see them and their fleet of luxury vehicles, but just close enough to make me give them the side-eye while driving by their casa. I would absolutely hate to live near one of the Irish Traveller trailer parks. I am fascinated by these trashy people, though. Like you said, they claim to be so religious & chaste, yet those young girls grind like seasoned strippers. They do not encourage any education amongst the girls. In a way, are they any different than those baby poppers the Duggars? I think not.
Submitted by Luvs2tango on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 3:05pm.
Back in 1969, my hubbie ordered from the factory in Coventry, England, in cash, a brand new, 1969 XKE hardtop Jag,
Gorgeous car...but my tastes are more like a '69 Chevy Camaro SS. Zoom...Zoom.
The bus driver for Hot Slui!
Wrong Lohan, God. But we appreciate the effort.
Jaguars are ugly as shit these days. I loved the ones in the 80s. Used to be, you could tell a Saab from a BMW from a Mercedes. Now they all look like Lexuses (Lexii?) Instead of being distinct, they all have the same profile and it pisses me off. How can this happen? Luxury cars all look the same, why bother buying one? Might as well get your money's worth with a Honda Civic or a Subaru outback.
The other day we walked past an old-school Jag and the owner was in it, and I caught his eye and kissed my bunched fingertips in appreciation of its beauty. He nodded; he understood.
Back in 1969, my hubbie ordered from the factory in Coventry, England, in cash, a brand new, 1969 XKE hardtop Jag, to be shipped to the states to sit in my mother's garage in Costa Mesa, CA, while we remained overseas. Black with red interior.
I thought he was nuts to waste money like that.
Goes to show you, I don't know shit.
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"Dancing is dreaming with your feet."
My Dad always wanted a Jag. A 60s one, though.
Anyway, they should just ban all Lohans from driving.
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
I know it's wrong to have been hopeful that this happened while he was standing on the curb or attempting to cross the street. It is just so wrong. *shames self*
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
Twat Muffin, they fascinate the hell out of me BUT I wouldn't want to live anywhere near them like you once did. Interesting to hear about but, more importantly, I'm also sorry you got taken advantage of by them. The women are just bizarre in the sense that they look like trashy ho's but apparently are chaste. During MBFGW, each episode I just couldn't wrap my brain around that one. Like in bad sci fi when they kill the robot with illogical shit, ha ha.
Yes. This is lovely news! I dislike this person - he is almost evil. He is not a harmless baffoon.
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Submitted by Anon PrimatePussy:
I hate all of you ignorant, judgemental, hypersensitive people. My opinion is all that matters and all of you are wrong. My opinions and thoughts are the only ones that count.
Sonne -- I noticed a lot of guys don't want their faces shown because they don't want people who were ripped off by them chasing them down.
Swarm-of-locusts -- OMG, that would be amazing to have a US version of MBFGW. I used to live near a huge house of "tinkers," another name for these gypsies & rip-off artists. They'd have one set of cars, all BMWs, Mercedes & Audis, and then they'd be gone for a while. Those cars would be replaced by a fleet of Range Rovers, Jaguars & the like. These people were really weird. While their house was immaculate (those gypsy women like to clean), they had a patio furniture set in their front yard and they built a house-sized garage on the back of their huge yard, most likely to house more gypsy in their grifting adventures. Having been personally taken advantage of by a few people (due to my good nature), I have nothing but contempt for these fuckers. I hope the law catches up with all of them one day, esp. the fucking Lohans.
@evil_cupcake: Exactly my point; we all know dude isn't making much money so the fact that he may own a low-end Jag is not impressive to me...
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Remember, the early bird may catch the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese...
lol, Twat Muffin, that would make sense. The husbands on MBFGW often didn't want to appear on camera, no doubt to avoid the law and other unpleasantries. The ones who did were really immature. An american version would be interesting... I think.
@Submitted by Twat Muffin on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 1:28pm.
I heard that they may do a version of MBFGW featuring USA Travellers. I told a friend that people could watch to identify who ripped them off and have warrants out for their arrest. I'm dying to know if any of the Travellers in the UK that were shown on air ended up arrested for past crimes.
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Taking crazy things seriously is a serious waste of time."
— Haruki Murakami
Submitted by chicasuperpoderosa on Sat, 06/18/2011 - 1:20pm.
Just by reading the headline I bursted in laughs. Am I a horrible person?
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Not at all! Bursting in laughs is completely appropriate..damn it's de rigeur, here.
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All the Young Dudes
USA 1972 - A travers l’Amérique avec Mott the Hoople~Ian Hunter
There is no way MK wrote that post. Yes, it is cunty, but seems to be missing something. A bit more spice. I dun know. But that headline made me feel happy.
Well, so much for my love of Jags. Frickin Lohans ruin EVERYTHING.
swarm-of-locusts -- it wouldn't surprise me if the Lohans are an American branch of the Irish Travellers featured on "My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding." They never talk about money on that show because the Travellers are notorious rip-off artists & gypsies con artists and have stolen everything they've got. It all makes sense now.
Ahahahaha Michael K!!! You are a SICK BASTARD and I so very love you.
Ahhahaha chicasuperpoderosa!
Me too! I haven't even read the post yet. I'm still laughing too hard at the headline.