Real Housewives, much like cats, don’t mix well with water (and hit the same level of shriek when they come into contact with H2O). It seems like every time someone in any city suggests an innocent dinner aboard an ocean-faring vessel, shit goes down. A recent Real Housewives Of New York City boat trip turned into Gilligan’s Island, and it was (shockingly enough) not because Ramona Singer spent the charter budget on Pinot Grigio – it’s because producers were too cheap to get a nice yacht!
Page Six reports the gals are in Cartagena, Colombia, but rather than turtle timing on P Diddy’s palace of the sea, the Bravo crew wound up on something that belonged on the “Free To A Good Home” section of Craigslist. Not only was the boat old AF, but the engine caught fire, per a source (most certainly Bethenny Frankel):
“Once they were ushered on board, the boat couldn’t even move. The anchor got stuck, so the crew had to saw the anchor off before they could sail anywhere. When they got out to sea, the engine caught fire. It was a huge blaze, and the crew was fighting to put it out. They didn’t have a fire extinguisher nor did they speak English.”
Adding to the fire, it sounds like nothing was nailed down, so shit was falling around the women, and the boat took on water. Oh, and there were only three life jackets. A less sensitive soul would say there was no need to pack life jackets since their combined boob implants could serve as a skiff back to shore, but you would never hear that from the likes me!
Bethenny, Ramona, and Dorinda Medley were soaked and screaming like drowned, harassed rats (let’s have a kiki!) while Carole Radziwill and Tinsley Mortimer barfed from seasickness. I think the only shocking part of this is that Tinsley got invited back to do another season. They made it out alive, but shit got so bad that Bravo had to offer the girls counseling. They probably haven’t had to do that since Aviva Drescher thought leg tossing was acceptable dinner entertainment!