Night Crumbs

August 27, 2014 / Posted by:

Robert Pattinson, Tom Sturridge, and Rob’s new “mystery girl” (she’s hiding behind Rob, because she’s ~so~ mysterious) went to lunch in New York, but all I really care about is why RPattz is dressed like a the broken condom hipster baby of Mickey Knox and Steve Zissou? – Lainey Gossip

You can always count on Backdoor Farrah to keep bringing the next-level delusion – Reality Tea

I know it looks like North West is giving a high-five, but it’s actually her non-verbal way of communicating “Please, take me with you” - Celebitchy

May god strike me down for ever thinking that Liv Tyler from the back looks like a Kardashian – Hollywood Tuna

Donatella Versace did the ALS ice bucket challenge, but what I REALLY want to see is Maya Rudolph as Donatella Versace taking the ice bucket challenge – Towleroad

Miley Cyrus wants you to know that even though the hot homeless dude she brought to the VMAs wasn’t homeless-homeless, he was homeless enough for her – WWTDD

While Mimi was busy strutting the streets of New York like a dynamic high-society HBIC, Nick Cannon was shuffling around in the same outfit all the boys in my 1st grade class wore - The Superficial

Here’s Sofia Vergara flashing one of her nipples to human-looking snapping turtle Derek Hough, if you need that in your life – (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather

Apparently, choosy sluts choose guys named Mark – Jezebel

Won’t somebody PLEASE give this toddler some attention???? – Popoholic

Wheelchair Jimmy and Nicki Minaj went on a snack run and WJ paid for everything, because he knows the quickest way to a girl’s butt is though her stomach (ew, what does that even mean?) – Popsugar

#15, would still totally eat – The Berry

Personally, I’m a Matt Damon girl myself, but I’m confident enough in my Mattsuality to admit that Ben Affleck looks like a total DILF here - ICYDK

Gross! Hasn’t the ocean suffered enough? – Just Jared

Bitch got fired suspended: the person-who-wrote-Kar-hoochie Tran’s-Blue Ivy-hair-joke-for-106 & Park edition – HuffPo

Replace every drawing with dicks wearing berets, and you’ve got all my French textbooks from grades 4 through 10 – OMG Blog

My say something nice is that Lady Gaga reminds me of Otto from The Simpsons here, and I can’t with a good conscience ever hate on Otto – SOW

Whatever happened to the days of getting stoned off your ass on Gravol before a flight and just blissing the fuck out? – Boy Culture

Pic: Splash

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