Jason Biggs’ wife Jenny Mollen has written about the time her and her husband got a prostitution whore in Las Vegas and she’s tweeted a pic of his ass crack becoming one with nature (and becoming one with ants who were looking for a nice, gushy pied-a-terre to stay in), and so of course when it came time for their baby to make an appearance, they documented all of it and burped it up on Instagram. On Jenny Mollen’s Instagram page are video after video of her in labor and I watched all of them. I can close my eyes and go to sleep, because I’ve seen a Kardashian in labor and I’ve seen Jason Biggs’ wife in labor. What more is there to see? Jenny gave birth three days ago in L.A. and she announced the birth and name of their son on Twitter today.
Sid Biggs. Full head of hair, huge penis, 10k twitter followers. #babybiggs
Sid Biggs sounds like the name of a used car salesman turned amateur Miami-area rapper or like the name of a mob boss on Grand Theft Auto. I like it. And Sid Biggs hasn’t even been out of his mom’s body for a week and she’s already talking about his penis to everybody. Sid Biggs has a long road of fuckery ahead of him. At first, I looked at that picture and thought he was just hanging out and getting acquainted with the world after the trauma of birth. But after reading her tweet, it’s pretty obvious that he’s thinking to himself, “Well, well, well, the fuck did I get myself into?”
(Pic via UsWeekly)