I just watched Lady CaCa ride into the American Music Awards on a rejected prop from War Horse and I hear Katy Perry opened that mess with some Memoirs of a White Geisha shit (how very Gwen Stefani of her ass), so I was actually happy to spend time with this video of all those One Direction twinks working out and slapping each other’s asses. If they were all Latino or French, it would look like scenes from the boy toy camp where JLo and Madge bought their leased pieces.
So this is why the world is suddenly extinct of 14-year-olds. This video made every 14-year-old give birth to a litter of AAAAAAHHHHs before combusting. I know I’m not one to talk since the dude my nipples got hot over when I was that age turned out be a lady beating piece of shady trash who wears khakis to court, but 15-year-olds really need better taste. I mean, this video could double as a PSA for the dangers and public embarrassment of getting shitty tattoos. If there was a Lisa Frank prison, those are the kind of tattoos you’d get in there.
And back to the AMAs, if you need a livestream, click here to watch the one I’m watching. It’s blurry and the sound is jacked up, but considering the messes who are performing tonight, maybe that’s a good thing?