McDonald’s vintage Halloween McPails!
Starting around 1985, McDonald’s offered up Happy Meals in a trick or treat pail every Halloween. Even though those pails were made by newborn babies in China for 1 cent each, those greedy, evil whores at McDonald’s charged you more for them. Those pails became the IT item of Halloween back when it wasn’t shameful to buy shit from McDonald’s. I had a few of these and they looked cute and sometimes matched my outfit, but they were pretty much worthless as a trick or treat tool. I only really used them as a Crayon pail and sometimes I used them to hold my “premium” candy. But you were setting yourself up for failure if you used this to trick or treat.
If you were going to rob a bank, you wouldn’t bring a janky, plastic bucket to hold all the money. That delicate plastic handle broke so many times. The trick or treating game can be a vicious one and you have come to prepared. My friends and I abandoned our pails early in the night and went home to get a pillow case or a trash bag. Who cares if I was dressed like up like a jailbird and my pillow case had a sunset scene on it. It was not about matching. It was about what was going to hold the most candy. It was about what was going to be down for me and keep it Halloween strong during my marathon trick-or-treating battle. A pillow case full of candy also made a good weapon. You could bop kids on the head with it to get to the front of the candy line.
So if you’re going to put on a kid’s costume and walk around on your knees to get free candy tonight, make sure to bring a pillow case. It’ll be your greatest tool.
Happy Halloween, whores!
And I just realized that today’s HSOTD should’ve been a pillow case!
Pic via Sydlexia (For Michelle)