Hot Slut Of The Day!
Frank, the drunk superhero of Wilmington, North Carolina whose superpowers include waking up his neighbors and pissing on his carpet. All of The Avengers wish they could pee anywhere like that. I bet Captain America is a shy pee-er.
Deadspin posted this letter that Frank's totally chill neighbor put on his door after he woke them up by flying around their living him in his shirt cape right before he shot liquid gold out onto their rug. Apparently, when Frank gets all the way drunk at bars, he becomes his superhero altar ego by turning his t-shirt into a cape. That's what he did on Saturday night and after he took a cab home from the bar, he stumbled into the wrong townhouse and gave his neighbors a fly and piss show. Frank's neighbor, who also deserves a HSOTD stamp of approval, either smokes tons of the good shit or they're the most reasonable people in the world, because anybody else would've maced Frank in the nuts as he took a piss on their favorite rug from Z Gallerie. But then again, how can you hate any dude with a shirt cape on?
And yeah, this is totally Frank Gifford. He got into Kathie Lee's stash again.
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I have to admit that various things have had me depressed this holiday season, but when I saw this, I laughed so hard! I'm thankful for Dlisted, really, because the site is ALWAYS the laugh I need.
I am not a fan of the super-drunk, but every once in a while, they make me laugh. This story reminds me of a story of my own. When my husband and I were dating in college, we spent the weekend at my parents' house. We were good little boys and girls and stayed in our separate rooms because otherwise it's just too creepy at your folks' house. The next morning, my husband discovered a blue plastic bag with liquid on it on the floor of the bedroom where he was staying. We hadn't a clue how it got there, and we both smelled pee and started laughing hysterically. Aparently, my brother was so drunk that he thought the guest bedroom was the bathroom and peed on the bag on the floor!!! And since my husband is such a heavy sleeper, he never knew. I just can't imagine if he had woken up during my brother's pee.
MK... I love it when you post letters. This summer when you were drunk posting...
You said you had some great and really insane emails. Since the world is going to end.. Not .. On Friday.. Can you share a few? Names changed to protect the host. Instead of the Darwin Awards we could have the Dlisted Awards..
After almost 6 years I bet you have some speshsshull ones you revisit from time to time. JUst for fun.. ? Just a thought. Xo B
I'd say I'm surprised by this but the truth is I heard it in a song while I was sleeping Tupside down in my daughter's closet.- Dog
as I listen to my new upstairs neighbor and their 3 small children stomp and jump so loudly it sounds like sonic booms in my apartment right now :(
*********★******★*********
"Oh, let me see if there's any fucks stuck under
my nails. Nope. Fresh out of fucks."
Love these guys. No worries but we will eff your life up if you don't comply. ;p Passive-aggresive notes be damned. "... or just fly over in your shirt-cape" HAHAHAHA
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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ROTFLMAO!!!
That story reminded me of a party the then-college boyfriend was having. I answered a knock on the door. A strange sunglasses-wearing dude that nobody knew was standing there...holding a five foot potted weed plant. He then asked everyone if they would like to meet Barry Manilow. That story had a better ending, though. *looks up an whistles*
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Sorry, but I draw the line at pee.
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God don't like ugly.
This situation is a little weird but THIS is how people should handle bad situations. With humor and dignity. Show the other guy how things should be done.
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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I have an incredibly bad temper. Thus, if I found this nutsack in my house, I would have thrown him out. I would have grabbed him by the balls and thrown him in the bushes. Gross!
I would also require that he come over and steam clean my damn rug. What a jerk.
This is where I should have lived when I was in my early twenties. Lol! Now the neighbors get pissed when we watch The Avengers too loudly on the surround sound with our four children! My, my have times changed for this former party-girl.
If truth is beauty, then we are all hideous monsters.
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 12/18/2012 - 11:02am.
LOL, of course. The classic. I feel that line should be brought out anytime home decor is defiled.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
This dude must be hooked up to an intravenous bong....what a chill guy!
Id be punching Mr Superman in his nuts...
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
Hahaha. This reminds me of the "Best of Craigslist" postings.
Submitted by vsminimoose on Tue, 12/18/2012 - 11:32am.
I wish I could be that cool about stuff. I would go absolutely nuts on someone...even if they were my best friend and they pulled that crap in my house.
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^^^^ THIS!! My letter would read: Dear Asshole... And just get worse from there. Probably a rant. I can't deal with super-drunk people. And I especially can't deal with some stranger's bodily fluid on my furniture. Fuck that!! But then again, I would not have let him in. Problem solved.
Santa: And what do you want for Christmas this year, Little Boy?
Little Boy: A shirt cape, Sir. Oh, wouldn't it be a wonderful world if we could all have shirt capes, Sir?
Santa: Yes it would, Child. God Bless Us every one.
My attempt at rewriting the classics -
Although I hate drunks (bad childhood memories), this is funny.
Frank could have been me and my friends back in the day.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Tue, 12/18/2012 - 11:52am.
I fine nuthin strage bout dis stoe-ree.... who the fuck hasn't done this shit... lol "L"
LOL! I found myself intrigues by the neighbor and how non plussed he was.:)
Submitted by RandéSleepover on Tue, 12/18/2012 - 11:14am.
Wilmington is where they filmed Dawson's Creek, no?
Yep.
Hi-freaking-larious!
My BFF lives in Wilm, and I can tell you with certainty that this right here is some Wilmington shit. They really can throw down at the beach.
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Devil's advocate.
I fine nuthin strage bout dis stoe-ree.... who the fuck hasn't done this shit... lol "L"
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"A Muppet and his money are soon parted." ~ Lu32Cy (aka Lucifer Sam)
"I'm back. You're Welcome." ~ Kenny Powers
Aww why can't my neighbors be this chill? They'd be all up in my face. Bunch of buzzkills. WHY WONT MY NEIGHBORS LET ME BE GREAT??!
for all you kill joys know they let him in. they seem like that type of folks.....
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Submitted by louise_brooks on Wed, 09/19/2012 - 10:19am.
Bitch, you are not better then Keanu Reeves!
I wish I could be that cool about stuff. I would go absolutely nuts on someone...even if they were my best friend and they pulled that crap in my house.
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Did anyone order me a plain cheese?
How does one just get into another's apt.?? Do people really leave their doors unlocked?
Franks neighbor is a stupid bitch if he did. He's lucky Frank didn't kill his ass and pee'd on his couch instead.
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
I love this!
I once left a similar note on the door of a girl who lived across the hall from me in my college dorm...she "got lost" going to the bathroom at 2 am and ended up at my door, butt ass naked, high out of her gourd. Rearranged everything in my drawers, barfed on the floor and stole my flip flops. I didn't have the heart to get the RA because she'd get in trouble, and she'd locked herself out, so I babysat her for two hours until her roommate got home. ...in retrospect, I wonder why she was doing drugs by herself?
Wilmington is where they filmed Dawson's Creek, no?
I'd say Chill Guy in 2B should make sure Super Frank can't get in.
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Tue, 12/18/2012 - 10:41am.
Boy, that rug really tied the room together.
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LOL, The Big Lebowski?
"...or just fly over in your shirt cape"
2B....u 2sweet♥
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Frank says "Lock ur door then."
Boy, that rug really tied the room together.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.