The UK Network Rail Service released three clips of ladies falling on their asses (and other body parts) in the subway and it’s supposed to be a PSA for the dangers of walking in the subway or whatever, but it’s really just a video for us to laugh at. Yes, I laughed at everyone breaking their asses, but I did learn three very important tips:
1. Lying down on the escalator is so much better than standing up on the escalator. I stand an average of 12 minutes per day and I can get that average down by lying on the escalator every time I take one. Standing up is hard and lying down is fun. Besides, when I get to the end, a hot piece might help me up.
2. Running is dangerous. Just don’t run, ever. If you think standing up sucks, running is even worse. That woman fell while running. Just lie down as much as you can. You can’t fall down while lying down. (Cut to me later tonight when I break my ass bone after rolling off the bed during sleep times.)
3. If you’re going to drunkenly work a subway platform pole in heels, make sure you’re wearing a cute outfit while doing so, because you will fall and on the footage will end up on the Internet and thousands of people will laugh at your ass. So you might as well look hot while they’re laughing at your ass.
See, that mess of a PSA isn’t only funny, it’s educational too.