Hot Slut Of The Day!
Target's limited-edition red velvet chocolate milk!
During holiday times, Target puts out their holiday milk flavors including red velvet chocolate milk. Now you don't have pour an entire bowl of red velvet cake batter into your eating hole. Making cake batter is really, really hard and now you don't have to. Who cares if it looks like a blood milkshake or like Twihard panty pudding or like Mrs. Claus' menst - I need to stop. It's a blended red velvet cake in a cup and I'm in love. I couldn't find it at Target the other day, but I'm guessing that's because Jessica Simpson is knocked up again and she bought every carton since she bathes in it every night. It's okay, I'll just continue to suck down red velvet cake batter with a straw until I find one.
(Pic via Tumblr)
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Twihard panty pudding omfg lmfaooooooooo. I'm cracking up here. That was by far the best line I have heard in years LOL. Yes I know, I need to get out more lol. =P
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Submitted by AtomicCity on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 12:55pm.
CheeryBitch, have you tried the Cherry Cordial M&M's? I had a couple over the weekend and was pleasantly surprised.
I had a shitacular experience yesterday when I was making cream cheese icing for a carrot cake I'd made. I'd be fine with never seeing cream cheese icing again in my life.
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I haven't! Will keep an eye out for them.
What happened with the frosting? (I bake A LOT.)
REAL red velvet cake is fantastic! Most bakeries fuck it up, especially grocery store "bakeries". If it's a candy apple red, AVOID. The color is a dead giveaway that it's crap.
And people wonder why the nation is obese.
This shit looks foul.
My eight-year old self would have loved this with peanut butter Crunch.
Looks like Jessica Simpson's *cough* *cough* "natural" 60 pound weight loss..
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Fair is foul and foul is fair..
this brings back awful memories from when I worked for at the vet's office. This appears to have the same consistency and color of a festering abscess on a dog's hind leg or neck. This would've been great for Halloween--let this stuff sit out and get to room temp and then chug it in front of the boss' wife.
Looks nasty but I bet it tastes good. ;)
Submitted by AlexDSSF on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 4:17pm.
Is it just me, or is red velvet cake BEYOND overrated? Whenever people talk about it, their dicks are hard or their vulvae are soaking wet just thinking about it. WHAT the hell is the fascination?
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"Real" Red Velvet cake is very good. It's basically a rich chocolate cake that has some sort of red color added to it, whether from beets or red wine etc.
The crap they sell now is basically a white chocolate "flavored" cake with obscene amounts of red dye. It's nasty.
this is my favorite recipe:
http://www.gilttaste.com/stories/2292-the-original-red-wine-velvet-cake-...
Now, it's not "red" but the true original brown. You can add some NATURAL food coloring to it if you must have it redder.
But please don't judge red velvet cake on the crap they sell at the stores, or some baker who dumps in 2 bottles of red dye, 'cause you'd be missing out!
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
Is it just me, or is red velvet cake BEYOND overrated? Whenever people talk about it, their dicks are hard or their vulvae are soaking wet just thinking about it. WHAT the hell is the fascination?
This is ruining red velvet cake's good name!!!
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"I think my butt looks too big in these jeans."
Submitted by Few Words on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 2:26pm.
did someone wring out a tampon? thats what the shit looks like.
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Well then. If at first I didn't gag, I'm projectile voming now. Fanks FW!
*wipes projectile vomit from monitor*
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 12:06pm.
I am going to make red velvet cake with beets!
......
I've never made it, but I heard it can be really good!
hmmmmmm....wonder how cupcakes made with this milk will taste?
*off to try it*
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Success is a great deodorant ~ Liz
did someone wring out a tampon? thats what the shit looks like.
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Never seen this and I was just there yesterday! Gotta go back!
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I am having trouble typing because I can't stop gagging. Blech! Why would you drink that?
But I do love eggnog, its my favorite for the holiday season. You can get it other times of the year but it's canned and costs at least $7. I can make my own but it never tastes as good.
Submitted by the original be... on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 12:54pm.
Sounds DEE-lish!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
This looks gross.
Thank you PrettyHateMachine!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
CheeryBitch, have you tried the Cherry Cordial M&M's? I had a couple over the weekend and was pleasantly surprised.
I had a shitacular experience yesterday when I was making cream cheese icing for a carrot cake I'd made. I'd be fine with never seeing cream cheese icing again in my life.
@GG Yeah I'll post in OP when I get home later
Deb - My mom uses buttermilk for just about EVERYTHING. But my FAVE (which she made for me on my b-day) is her Chocolate Angel-Food Cake (so light it should just FLY off the plate!) with her home-made Chocolate Ganache.
I DIE!
And I LOVE my mom!
Submitted by louise_brooks on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 11:44am.
It's similar to chocolate cake, but with buttermilk and vinegar added. The chemical reaction gives it the red color.
But, really, it's just a cream cheese frosting delivery system.
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louise, that's it! My mom used to bake it for my birthday. I didn't know about the vinegar, but I know she used buttermilk. I can't stand ordinary chocolate layer cake. But Red Velvet Cake made RIGHT is sublime! I actually brought home some Tastykake Red Velvet cupcakes from PA. Not their best product. Stick to the Kandykakes!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
PHM, can you post that recipe?
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Home-made German Chocolate Cake with home-made frosting. Any day, all day, every day of the week.
Red Velvet can lick my ass.
CB - I covet those damn Candy Cane Kisses. I hate me for that!
thought it was strawberry kefir.
this stuff is toxic but wth
Target also has white chocolate peppermint M&Ms, and they are the SHIT. So good!
Red Velvet cake is gross. I have tried it twice and that was enough for me to know I hate it. I am not a big cake fan or chocolate fan for that matter, but once in a great while I will make a chocolate cake with black coca powder and chocolate ganache frosting. It's vegan and it's delicious. You can't even tell it's vegan.
I am still mad at Target though for having pumpkin cheesecake cookies...they are so good.
vsminimoose -- thank you! I've had red velvet and it's nothing to write home about. It's bland chocolate cake. Give me a regular chocolate cake any day. It's trendy, that's all it is. However, cream cheese frosting makes anything better.
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"I'm from Chicago, bitch!"
I have been told that the beets is what gave the cake its reddish color, so that you dont have to use the food coloring. I'll let you all know how it turns out.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
My favorite Raspberry Red Velvet Cake recipe, which I modified since don't put in nearly as much red dye as they say to- usually 1-2 tsp instead of a whole bottle. It still comes out reddish! I also add 1 Tbsp of raspberry liquor to the batter and put shredded coconut on top of the icing.
http://community.cookinglight.com/showthread.php?67066-Red-Raspberry-Vel...
Submitted by Gardening Girl: "I am going to make red velvet cake with beets!"
Do it and let us know how it came out! I think it would be good. Nice and dense and moist, I bet. It's probably like a zucchini or carrot bread, where the texture is divine and you can't taste the veg in it.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 12:06pm.
I am going to make red velvet cake with beets!
LOL. Won't that make it, err, beet-y?
I am going to make red velvet cake with beets!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
MJT, somebody told me last night that it looked like a deflated peen!
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
As far as the origin of red velvet cake, I'd say you're all right (and it's probably lost in the mists of time). There's even a Canuck connection: Eaton's department stores used to serve it in the 40s and 50s:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_velvet_cake
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 11:57am.
OMG, your AVIE! HAHAAHAHAHAHA. It looks like sad santa clown!
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
That looks foul. I have never been a sweets person though. A mini snickers everyonce in a while but that's about it.
Seriously that is giving me the voms.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
I love red velvet cake, this shit no. My tummy would be fighting a war in there trying to digest it.
I don't mind red velvet cake but the problem is most bakeries don't know how to do it right and add too much red food dye. RV is supposed to be richer and denser than regular chocolate cake, kind of like devils food. This concoction looks disgusting.
*fans IV*
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
;( That looks like day two business right there.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
This reminds me that my period has not arrived in two months, and that I am probably in the men-o-paws.
EWU - just - EWU
I just had to read about red velvet cake, since it's a little foreign to me. It was never a "thing" where I grew up in CT.
But the traditional "ermine" frosting is. It's what we use as whoopie pie filling, and we always called it "poor man's whipped cream" and it's my favorite icing! It's fluffy and delicious and not too sweet.
Who knew? You learn something every day!
Sugar free cake.? Or tastes like ass cake!
It's similar to chocolate cake, but with buttermilk and vinegar added. The chemical reaction gives it the red color.
But, really, it's just a cream cheese frosting delivery system.
Submitted by Ophelias evil twin on Fri, 11/30/2012 - 11:39am.
first time I ever heard of it was in Steel Magnolia for the armadillo groom's cake.
"It’s repulsive. It’s got gray icing. I can’t even begin to imagine how you make gray icing! But the worst is the cake part, is red velvet cake — blood red! People are gonna be hacking into this poor animal and it’ll look like it’s bleeding to death!!"
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Same. I was fascinated by that cake.
first time I ever heard of it was in Steel Magnolia for the armadillo groom's cake.
"It’s repulsive. It’s got gray icing. I can’t even begin to imagine how you make gray icing! But the worst is the cake part, is red velvet cake — blood red! People are gonna be hacking into this poor animal and it’ll look like it’s bleeding to death!!"