Monday, August 15th 2011
Open Post: Hosted By Emmitt Thunderpaws
This video of a gargantuan horse dog named Emmit Thunderpaws (Pregnant celebwhores, take note. That is a name!) freaking out over the return of his military dad after 9 months apart will make you do 3 things:
1) Feel a thin layer of warmness over the mound of ice cold ground vulture meat in your chest.
2) Petition for Emmit Thunderpaws to join the cast of Dancing with the Stars.
3) Google "Great Dane lipstick."
via The Daily What
• 
Get well soon,EEG!
Stay positive,Stoney!
Cheer up,Mommy-ladies!
Submitted by mike on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 2:34pm.
Submitted by kokoskitten on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 2:33pm.
Someone already did? :(
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No...I just saw that you read DD and so do I (way too much) and if ever there is a fucked up story I figured that would be it.
*side-eyez ME's BH ferociously*
I guess I should be glad to have a Monday night and maybe Tuesday night off. If I can stay away. I usually get the guilts and go pick him up after he spends the first night away from me.
@Snowy
I know what you mean. I work for a collections firm and all sortsa folks are claiming bcy to be able to stay in their house. A lot of times if they sue the lenders the court makes them make payments into the court registry, so it's not an all you can get away with buffett. Then they claim bcy.
athens, so sorry! Plus Tara Reid is there! ((HUGS)) Anyone who is good with WP come to NYC and I will get you a job and me a bonus!
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
Submitted by kokoskitten on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 2:33pm.
Someone already did? :(
Submitted by mike on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 2:29pm.
I have another fucked-up story that I was going to post about, but if y'all have already had your fill of negativity today...
___________________________
You're going to post the decapitated kid story right?
M.E. I fucking hope I do, I hate it there, I can't sell it, I can't afford my mortgage and I can't refinance, also they are going to raise my bus pass from $300 to $500 a month, I have been looking into it, it seems everyone is doing it...
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
i have to conribute now that i lost my shitty job too
Sandbitch, from your use of the word "bloke," you're clearly a Brit. And, sad to say, the British were better at seeing through our (America's) phony wars than Americans were. We're still confused about them, but accept them because- well- that's how it is, a steady diet of oil and war. The "bloke" in uniform, unless he is in the military strictly for the benefits, likely hasn't a clue why we really go to war and kill so many civilians, on the flimsiest of pretexes. It may not be popular to say it, but using adorable children, knocked up wives, and slobbering, loyal pets to divert our attention from reality is pretty lame, yet it works.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Submitted by Sandbitch on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 2:19pm.
Not another bloke in a US military outfit *in the US* heartwarming opportunity. I'd rather watch the dog eat its own POO!
While I'm at it, fave episodes of Toddlers and Tiaras is when one of the kiddies parents is in the fucking military. You just know the kid is going to come out wearing a glittery tank or scale a 10ft wall.
**TAKE.THE.UNIFORMS.OFF.YOU.FUCKING.POSERS**
There, I've said it.
Whoops OPEN POST?
Mike - Post away!
Stoney, just reading back now. Holy shit, girl. I'm sorry you have to go through all that again. Best of luck for a new opportunity.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
snowphat - WHAT?????????????????
don't lose your house girl!
I have another fucked-up story that I was going to post about, but if y'all have already had your fill of negativity today...
I'm not paying my mortgage this month, I'm done, why should everyone get over but me. If I default I can use my 401K money or I will just do a "Strategic Default"
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
Holee Shit!!
Stoney my love, I'm so sorry
M.E. my love, I'm so sorry
EEG, my love, I am so sorry
ISMU, my love, I am so proud
Preferred User - time off?
Nope.
I haz to be productive with the few hours I get on Saturdays!
BH's the one who got a free all alone weekend. No wife, no kids.
Asshole.
MIGRAINE!!
Stoney was laid off today
EEG is on her way to the hospital. Details not given.
I lost all my fish in a mass suicide this weekend (not really, some disease killed em all)
Um...talking about school getting started and....
*gives M.E. jelliz side-eye for getting time off*
I was chopping (typo and it stays)for B2Sch all weekend and now I have a whole $60 to get me thru to next payday. Gramma took him for a couple days for me though, he was playing deaf all weekend and giving me hell.
Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:59pm.
The Grey Gardens ladies? Are they moving?
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They aren't moving but I lost my shit after last week. Monday one emails me (since we canceled our home phone) and asked if we could come over. I said no, we were unavailable for the week due to company coming in. I'm expecting at any time for her to get the hint and not constantly call (when we had the number) or email. No such luck. I get a pissy, selfish, crazy assed email from her Saturday night (when we just so happened to be hosting a party for my husband's coworkers) and says she wants to sit down and discuss with me why I don't seem to want to talk to her and that she is SO upset that I'm not including her. I just wrote her back, said that I did not wish to discuss it, that I'm totally turned off by so many things that have happened in the year and a half since we've lived here but the last few weeks have been the last straw with her incessant calls and emails and making it all about her and why she's being wronged instead of getting the hint that I was distancing my family.
My last straw was her being a bitch to my five year old on Sunday morning because she was raising her voice at him demanding he go inside and get me because she HAD to talk to me. Said the entire relationship has gotten to upsetting and stressful for myself and my family and that I don't want to continue a relationship.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Stoney: please come and work with me, they are hiring someone and if I refer you I will get a couple grand that I could REALLY use right now!
(it's all about me) :P Seriously GAW, you just got over this with the last job! Ugh, sorry
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
Someone fill a triflin' ho in on the happenings around these parts.
We hope that precious little citizen gets extra treats and hugs tonight!
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:58pm.
So, school starts next Wednesday for the boys.
We went and bought them new backpacks, new lunch boxes, a couple outfits, a pair of shoes each and G'ma is taking them to Old Navy today to spoil the shit out of them.
*sniff*
I now have TWO kids in elementary school.
I NO LONGER HAZ BABY!
*bawls*
___
My daughter graduated last spring, a few days ago she moved into her own place.
I have been pretty much a wreck since she left. All these wonderful "back-to-school" displays just seem to be rubbing my face in the fact that not only do I no longer have a child in school, I no longer have a child at home.
Walking past her empty room is just wrenching.
I envy you the time you still have ahead of you.
________________________________________________
'Let's eat Grandma!' or, 'Let's eat, Grandma!' Punctuation saves lives. Use it. Save a life.
Not another bloke in a US military outfit *in the US* heartwarming opportunity. I'd rather watch the dog eat its own POO!
While I'm at it, fave episodes of Toddlers and Tiaras is when one of the kiddies parents is in the fucking military. You just know the kid is going to come out wearing a glittery tank or scale a 10ft wall.
**TAKE.THE.UNIFORMS.OFF.YOU.FUCKING.POSERS**
There, I've said it.
Whoops OPEN POST?
well, I love you all too.
and I must admit to being a sezzzy grandma....
you'll be too.
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Oh God ,why don't you go sit under a rainbow and write a poem, Kyle.
@Stoney
Um. I'm not sure Raul's firm has an actual location. I believe, knowing him as we all do, it's probably a reference to his lap.
Preferred Username would prefer not to get all up in his bizness, but I bet he will confirm this shortly. Or confirm that his firm is not of the shortly variety. Or he might take a swing and hit Preferred Username with his CB for discouraging your application.
Awe Hoff. It's ok. We still love you!
M.E.
my kids are ten years apart, ( Different marriages ) , and my one friend jokingly told me when I was preggers with ross, the last one, that I'd maybe be a grandma with a still small child in the house...
YEAH, WELL FUCK HER TOO!!!!!!!
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Oh God ,why don't you go sit under a rainbow and write a poem, Kyle.
Hoff - LMAO @ "fuck you"
HAAHAHA!!! Nice and gentle as always! ♥
Thanks for everyone's kind words.
*considers working at raul's firm*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
My kids spent the entire weekend away from home. I feel like I haven't seen them in WEEKS!
But when I got home from work last night they did both doggie pile me and we got some good snuggle time in.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:58pm.
So, school starts next Wednesday for the boys.
We went and bought them new backpacks, new lunch boxes, a couple outfits, a pair of shoes each and G'ma is taking them to Old Navy today to spoil the shit out of them.
*sniff*
I now have TWO kids in elementary school.
I NO LONGER HAZ BABY!
Oh,fuck you , I'm a grandmother with an eleven year old.
"tweaks M.E.'s nipples"
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Oh God ,why don't you go sit under a rainbow and write a poem, Kyle.
UBF - awe!
*shares hankey*
If your son has anybit of your personality he'll be FINE! :D
Stoney,
xoxoxo
I just had 3 days of mind blowing debauchery! You deserve some debauchery.
DEBAUCHERY heals the soul
My son joined the air force and has been gone only 4 months, but it's the longest I've been without one of my babies and anytime I see one of these soldiers coming home thingys, I cry like a baby..even this one with a dam dog. yeah, I know.
EEG, hope it all goes well, and wishing you the speediest recovery...filled with wonderful pain killers.
Stoney: that sucks! let's hope it's one of those when the door closes another one opens kinda things and something even better is coming your way! real soon like too.
I hear you, M.E. , my oldest is going to Jr. High starting Monday. Makes me feel old as shit , plus I am terrified for him. MK`s "Junior High is Hell" post a few days ago and everyone`s bullying stories didn`t necessarily ease my fears....
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
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http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:51pm.
((hugs to EEG))
I AM FINALLY ANNOYING NEIGHBOR FREE AFTER THIS WEEKEND!
*cabbage patches*
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The Grey Gardens ladies? Are they moving?
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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate
So, school starts next Wednesday for the boys.
We went and bought them new backpacks, new lunch boxes, a couple outfits, a pair of shoes each and G'ma is taking them to Old Navy today to spoil the shit out of them.
*sniff*
I now have TWO kids in elementary school.
I NO LONGER HAZ BABY!
*bawls*
I'm so sorry to hear that! I have fish too, people don't realize how cool and personable they are....I know how you feel, I lost some old fish last year because a foster cat decided to clean the tank out! There had been other foster cats in there that enjoyed watching the tank, but this guy's a total terror, not surprisingly, his attitude extends to any other living thing so he's still here, sigh. One of the fish was at least 5 when it happened...I was pretty bummed too, I feel your pain.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 08/15/2011 - 1:13pm.
In other pet related news. We lost all 6 of our goldfish, 2 plecostomus, and 1 snail this weekend.
D E A D.
Yet another example of how dogs are better than most humans...
I did fucking forget!!!! been texting to nowhere!!!
GP here, off I go. Thanks for the love whores.
What`s the deal with EEG? Am I post-blind today, or why can`t I find anything????
Anyway, from what i can pick up from the replies is you`re sick. So get better, girl!
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
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http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs
Uvy - I'm glad you told that bitch whats up!
((hugs to EEG))
I AM FINALLY ANNOYING NEIGHBOR FREE AFTER THIS WEEKEND!
*cabbage patches*
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
Stoney - that sucks. I'm sorry.
EEG - WHORE! You get yourself better, you hear?
Wow sorry EEG and Stoney, shitty day all arouind, EEG, remember? I LOST MY PHONE! I don't have anyone numbers anymore! Please stay in touch thru FB if possible.
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
I love this dog
I love this video, cripes I'm all weepy.
Stoney keep your chin up girl! You have a wonderful fiance and plenty of reason to know you are better than that shitty job filled with shitty people WHO SUCK and don't appreciate you.
Thanks, yall.
*sniff*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
OMG I WISH I could drink right now!!! I came into the studio early and I know I would get in big trouble with the Canadian if I used this as an excuse to get drunk.
*kills self*
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Damn. Sorry about your job-situation, Stoney. Best of luck to you on the job-search.
On the video, dude needs to stop acting scared when the dog jumps on him or he `ll end up the dog`s bitch sometime soon.
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
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http://www.youtube.com/user/beeper246#p/a/u/2/BrO86m4qAEs