Open Post: Hosted By Geordie Shore
Jersey Shore, the syphilis outbreak that was made in America, has already spread to our neighbors in Canada and now it has jumped across the sea and infected the UK. Above is the intro to Georgie Shore which features a whorey crew of fine lads and lasses who will attempt to out slut, out orange, out wax, out booze, out silicone, out roid and out piss-in-the-hot-tub our American pride and joys!
Keep your eye (and other parts) on Gary! He's the douuchebag (they add an extra "u" in England) that's going around telling people his dick is the size of a remote control. And just like a remote control, I'm sure you have to manually point Gary's dick in the right direction because it's too stupid to find it on its own. And just like my remote control, I'd hit it several times until it worked for me.
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'Out slut, out orange, out wax, out booze, out silicone, out roid and out piss-in-the-hot-tub' ... is that even possible? Michael K, what are you smoking?
Submitted by yucko on Thu, 04/28/2011 - 9:58am.
Eh, "roun' here" (as we "Deep South American hillbillies" might say, @BeatABitchDown), we have tornadoes every year around this time, pretty much. Nothing new. Although I agree that the extremes of weather in general do seem to be getting somewhat worse...
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Okay, good to hear an on-the-ground update; I think Jacks yesterday posted that they got hammered again and by late last night I got worried in general b/c the numbers of ppl hurt went from the 20s to 200s. To my NE butt, it just seems like such a battering (this morning, it's here on the atlantic seaboard now as 'expected super cell t-storms' later today). Thx, Yucks
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See the Screw-Up Fairy has visited us again...someone get that skank a drink already!
The Mind's-Eye is the last thing left....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbbfDntoRRk (Kurosawa's Epic "Ran" 1985)
Submitted by caprica six on Thu, 04/28/2011 - 12:32am.
Okay, just saw that the numbers of deaths/hurt in the south/central tornado zone has damn literally quadrupled. Any DL'ers there?!! I know Jacks is dealing with them. Who else?? Stay safe guys and let us know how the sitch is, srrsly.
This weather is unbelievable. 39 years on this Earth and I can NEVER recall weather/bio shit this drastic. Thoughts are w/ the south/central peeps dealing with the 400+ fucking twisters/tornadoes. Jesus.
edited locale info
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Eh, "roun' here" (as we "Deep South American hillbillies" might say, @BeatABitchDown), we have tornadoes every year around this time, pretty much. Nothing new. Although I agree that the extremes of weather in general do seem to be getting somewhat worse...
Submitted by Centaurious on Thu, 04/28/2011 - 12:51am.
I love the way England is copying us for once.
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Oh and what a wonderful thing to emulate!
LMAO @ "douuchebag" and "just like my remote control, I'd hit it several times until it worked for me."
* * * * * * * * * *
White Wedding
I love the way England is copying us for once.
I have to admit when I heard the dick remote control, I thought of the 80's MTV show "Remote Control" with Colin Quinn and Kari Wuhrer.
Where are they now?!
I watched that show every day with my brother.
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"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Marjorie Ingall
Okay, just saw that the numbers of deaths/hurt in the south/central tornado zone has damn literally quadrupled. Any DL'ers there?!! I know Jacks is dealing with them. Who else?? Stay safe guys and let us know how the sitch is, srrsly.
This weather is unbelievable. 39 years on this Earth and I can NEVER recall weather/bio shit this drastic. Thoughts are w/ the south/central peeps dealing with the 400+ fucking twisters/tornadoes. Jesus.
edited locale info
~~~~~~~~~~~
See the Screw-Up Fairy has visited us again...someone get that skank a drink already!
The Mind's-Eye is the last thing left....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AbbfDntoRRk (Kurosawa's "Ran")
This place LuLu's opened up near me. They make homemade red velvet twinkies and double dipped chocolate twinkies. Looks like I'll be looking like Charles Durning in a swimsuit this summer, again. Sigh.
Everybody ready for the Royal Wedding? Got your drinks and snacks in? Claimed dibs on the comfiest chair in the house?
.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kjp0EhQCFM0
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 8:35pm.
I don't usually OP but I just had ta chime in on the cake thing...
Me neither, and I have no idea what the original post entailed because my lazy PMS'ing ass can't be bothered to scroll thru everything, but the absolute best cake I've ever made is the Barefoot Contessa's honey vanilla pound cake. Not to sweet...just the way I like it (I have a salty tooth, not sweet). It's divine, and pretty hard to screw up, even for a terrible baker like me. Now I want some because this is like the worst PMS ever. Really fucking delicious. It's that time of the month and I would kill for some right now....
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"Fuck that guy for thinking anybody and everybody should want to do Glee." - Dave Grohl
Lmfao @ DWM
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I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 8:44pm.
You just couldn't wait to post that until AFTER my morning ultrasound!
Fuckin' STARVING over here with this fasting shit… X^\
How about I say.. Urinal CAKE
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 8:44pm.
You just couldn't wait to post that until AFTER my morning ultrasound!
Fuckin' STARVING over here with this fasting shit… X^\
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SORREH!
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Only a ginger can call another ginger "ginger." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLLYO8Hd_sE
Queenie.. don't cry.. if you cry.. then I'll cry.. we'll all cry..
fuuuuuck
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
Fuck PLEASE stop talking about cupcakes, I call my male friend who likes to jerk it to me cupcake and Imma los~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*cries*
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 9:03pm.
Simply. Brilliant.
AGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Well, at least now I'm not hungry anymore!
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booze-free baby shower (THE WORST!!!!)
CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__PU5CVSegg
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
What's goin on beeetches? We bein grumpy?
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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
STOP SAYING "CAKE"!!!!!
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booze-free baby shower (THE WORST!!!!)
Hotmami, your goodness shines through your posts and there will always be @ssholes in the world, it's the good people like yourself that make life worth carrying on for others who need a shining light when times get tough. Don't ever give up on your inner shine because nothing feels shittier for a nice person with a good heart to sink to a low you normally wouldn't go to.
*Bakes Hotmami a chocolate fudge cake*
Heading off to bed early...it's been a long coupla weeks. UGH!
*hugs back to CSG*
In lighter news, ya'll have made me seriously hungry for cake. *loosens belt*
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 8:11pm.
You're right, UBF. Idk, I've never had it in me to be purposefully mean or cruel to people, even though many people have been that way towards me. I try as hard as I can to be a good person, and it doesn't seem to get me anywhere.
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(((HUGS MAMI)))
Don't let the evil trash in this world turn you into one of them, that's what they thrive on. It seems to be an especially hard time for everyone right now, just try and get through it with as much grace and class as you can muster (and remember you can always come here and snark on the evil trash).
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Welcome to a world where the people teaching our youth are making 1/20th of what the whores tainting our youth are making. YAY!!!! - MK 4/9/11
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 8:35pm.
You just couldn't wait to post that until AFTER my morning ultrasound!
Fuckin' STARVING over here with this fasting shit… X^\
(It sounds delisherous.)
_________________________
booze-free baby shower (THE WORST!!!!)
RE: Cake
Cake is super easy to make from scratch. I don't get the whole "Cake in a box" or store-bought cake mentality? And that gawdawful lard frosting they put on store-bought cakes is just beyond reprehensible.
I don't usually OP but I just had ta chime in on the cake thing...
Cake is great if it is a good quality, homemade cake. What I don't get is the "cake for cake's sake" mentality - I won't eat garbage-y cake. And the whole cupcake "fad" is completely lost on me. They might be pretty to look at, but they are just little sugar-bombs. Team Just-Cuz-It's-Sweet-Don't-Make-It-A-Treat.
I am one of those bitches who will cheerily spend an afternoon making a big ol' cake from scratch. This is my very favorite cake recipe: 3-layer Pistachio Cake with White-Chocolate Buttercream Frosting...
http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/food/recipes/pistachio-cake-with-white-ch...
I've made this cake a bunch of times - sans the ridiculous caramelized shards - it's fucking awesome. It does take time to make, but it's not difficult.
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Only a ginger can call another ginger "ginger." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLLYO8Hd_sE
Nice is for chumps!
*heads for Chump Clubhouse*
_________________________
booze-free baby shower (THE WORST!!!!)
You're right, UBF. Idk, I've never had it in me to be purposefully mean or cruel to people, even though many people have been that way towards me. I try as hard as I can to be a good person, and it doesn't seem to get me anywhere.
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Submitted by Uncle Brain-fart on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 8:07pm.
Hotmami, being nice is not paying off in this world. I just keep it up cause i m worried about meeting my maker one day and don`t know what to say when he asks me why i was such an asshole all the time...
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For true.
I wish I had something uplifting to say but I'm too cranky and frustrated and disordered. Peace and blessings to us all.
♥ Threadkilla!
Kelly Osbourne! Eep!
Three Pop Stars, One Song:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6474802/three-pop-stars-one-song-with-...
Hotmami, being nice is not paying off in this world. I just keep it up cause i m worried about meeting my maker one day and don`t know what to say when he asks me why i was such an asshole all the time...
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
LOL at UBF and Queenie...thanks, ladies.
I can't figure out why my ex is doing what he is doing to me. Makes me wonder what the point of being a nice person is.
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
I don`t have Reese`s, but i can offer a hug and leftover Easter M&M`s to ya, Hotmami!!
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"I also have felt the nose heat of the man meat."
SFRB, 04/26/11
Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 7:49pm.
*apologizes in advane for Debbie Downer-ness*
I am depressed out of my mind today, and struggling to keep from crying at my desk. I seriously feel like I can't handle my life sometimes.
Someone get me a dick and a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup.
*************
If he will consent, I will lend you my old man
*hugs HotMami*
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
*apologizes in advane for Debbie Downer-ness*
I am depressed out of my mind today, and struggling to keep from crying at my desk. I seriously feel like I can't handle my life sometimes.
Someone get me a dick and a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup.
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Michael K I'm in Brazil. All your ads are in Portuguese. How the F am I to know "Qual o celular mais LINDOOOOOOOO do Brasil"?? You tell me.
Thanks, LaChaylo.
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 5:17pm.
FUCK my goddamn life.
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*serves Hotmami full glass of vino and half a Milky Way*
((((Hugs)))) - don't know what you're going through, but I hope things get better for you soon.
It only sounds harsh because you probably didn't have the experience I had. Maybe you weren't there for very long or you didn't mix with a lot of people. Maybe you were just lucky enough to know a few friendly (and likely, well-educated) people and this informed your experience. Let me assure you - these obnoxious people are not the minority in northeast England.
I worked in Newcastle and lived on the coast around Newcastle - and both of those for the better part of a decade. I worked for the government and another major employer. I took public transport daily. I got out every day and went loads of places. I knew HUNDREDS of people. I know what I'm talking about.
Although it might be unpalatable to a few readers here, I can safely say it is a thoroughly unpleasant place because of the people and the climate and I'm so glad I left.
The only person I know in Newcastle was kind enough to send me a book about Hadrian's wall.
is liquid Valium a real thing?
i can haz?
*goes to pawn shop with ex-boyfriend's wedding ring"
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Download "Come Back As A Flower: Songs of Stevie Wonder" at http://tiny.cc/u5fa8
BeatABitchDown: That's pretty harsh. I moved from Toronto to the coast outside Newcastle in 2005, and while these people do exist, there are in the minority. Geordies are among the friendliest people in the world and they get a bad rap, they are more than the clubbers and the hen do-ers. The drinking problem can be said for any part of the UK.
I used to live and work in the part of England where these people are from - the northeast/Newcastle area. Some of the most rude, stupid people on Planet Earth live in this part of the world. They're even more scary than your standard Deep South American hillbilly because many of them begin drinking in childhood, plus I'm convinced that the perpetual rain and grey skies has warped any ability to feel compassion. The stories I could tell you would make you faint. I am not exaggerating.
If I ever go back to England, I'll briefly visit with some family and then get the hell out of there as fast as I can.
FUCK my goddamn life.
***********************************************
I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
Living in Newcastle myself, I can say those people are TAME compared to regular Geordie/Mackems!
Holly is the only one that can even hold a candle to the beauty of the JS cast.
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"Shit. Since when did sexting become a community college English class?" - MK
Submitted by Provolone on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 3:41pm.
Speaking of food...tell me none of you wouldn't eat the FUCK out of this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9FRSghXhDM
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I just threw up in my mouth a little.
But I still want one of them Big Macs:(
♥ Threadkilla!
Kelly Osbourne! Eep!
Three Pop Stars, One Song:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6474802/three-pop-stars-one-song-with-...
Submitted by louise_brooks on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 3:13pm.
Fishy- no, but I heard there are a ton of celeb cameos in it. Is it good?
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Yeah, it's a good song but really fun to see all the celebs. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSai5klswws
Submitted by Migraine Sally on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 2:53pm.
I am in such a foul mood today. Quick! I need the following:
One real Coke
some liquid Valium
a shank (I broke mine off in someone's ass)
a desktop chocolate fountain
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I'd love to be able to help you out but I have to be honest: if I found this stuff I'd totally keep it. SoR-RaY! *wanders off to steal chocolate from children*
♥ Threadkilla!
Kelly Osbourne! Eep!
Three Pop Stars, One Song:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6474802/three-pop-stars-one-song-with-...
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 04/27/2011 - 3:21pm.
Koko - I have a strong hatred for frosting and I've never really liked cake.
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Yes, M.E, that is very odd.