Ryan Dunn Was Drunk
West Goshen Police Chief Michael Carroll announced today that Jackasses' Ryan Dunn had a blood alcohol level of 0.196% when he crashed his Porsche into a tree, killing himself and his friend Zachary Hartwell. Police Cheif Carroll also said that Ryan was going anywhere from 132-140mph before the crash. That tension you feel in the air is Roger Ebert's hand hovering over his keyboard while he thinks about typing out the characters I-T-O-L-D-Y-O-U-S-O. The details from CNN:
"The initial crash reconstruction investigation determined that Mr. Dunn's vehicle was traveling between 132-140 mph at the time of the collision," West Goshen Police Chief Michael Carroll said in a statement Wednesday.Toxicology testing by the coroner indicated Dunn's blood alcohol concentration was 0.196%, which is more than twice the legal state limit of 0.08, Carroll said.
Everything (and I mean fucking everything) has already been said. The lesson here is, if you're drunk enough to bleed Blood Marys, then it's probably not a good idea to hit the gas pedal on your Porsche until it touches 140 on the odometer. Take a pedicab! Or a shopping cart! Actually, don't take a shopping cart.
By the way, when my mom saw this story on the news, the first thing she said was, "SAD! But I like that dog he carried around in that movie with Iron Man." Your mom probably said the same thing.
Submitted by Bossy on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 3:19pm.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 2:30pm.
I registered a .24 when I got my DWI.... GO BIG OR GO TO HELL!!!!
*****************
Well I blew a whopping 6.0 and had EVERYONE impressed! So I'm even more impressive than you are. It was amazing. Shoulda seen me. It was 6 pieces of bubblegum though. But all at once!
*********************************************
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 2:59pm.
I feel bad for the passenger, the car, and the tree. That pretty much covers it.
********************
Well, maybe not the passenger. Depends. The poor tree just happened to be there, the car was doing its job, but it's POSSIBLE the passenger could've done something to help prevent this senseless act. Like making the choice to at least not get in the car with Dunn, if he couldn't first get the keys away from him. Surely he knew the state Dunn was in, or at least was aware that he'd been drinking a lot that night, regardless of his tolerance level. Princess Diana's driver had a high tolerance level too.
What if there hadn't been a passenger to "impress?" Because I'm SO impressed with the guys out there with such amazing talent they can gun their engines and press the accelerator further down than the rest of us can. Well, we can, we just choose not to. We know we're not the gifted Formula 1 drivers that they are.
Who knows, maybe there was even some encouragement there, just a little (= more than enough), coming from the passenger's seat.(?) A possible "Floor it man, let's see how fast this baby can take us!" And if there was no encouragement, if there were only scared-to-death (hmmmm, death) pleas to SLOW DOWN! then Dunn was a bigger jerk than EVER, if that's even possible, for terrifying-to-death his friend like that. And for what?
Go to a drag strip you self-crowned racers. Do your showing off there (with your driving skills, not your equally impressive blood alcohol levels). Then at least you're not putting at risk those of us who aren't interested. (That would be mostly everyone.) And everyone else. And don't crash into beautiful trees, pick an ugly wall or dumpster or something.
What the hell kind of fuckery went on in here last night?
*waves white scarf*
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Thu, 06/23/2011 - 1:12am.
Yep, I saw numerous episodes and their antics still don't impress me much. Then again, I'm a lover of men, not little boys who refuse to grow up.
------
That's totally fine with me, but someone died, there's no reason to express the anger about a "man's-show" over it. There are enough series for women in which women try to kill themselves by getting one plastic surgery after the other - just show some respect to the diversity of characters.
And sorry, but neither Ryan Dunn nor Bam Margera were that dumb that they tried to kill themselves - I'm pretty sure you mixed them up with Steve-O and others on the show.
FIIIIRRRRSSSTTT!
........and there you have it! The End!
And so it begins.....
AP is reporting they were planning to sue bar but video shows he wasnt too intoxicated...appartantly fans brought a last round and that may have gotten him too drunk. I would hate to be those fans..
Fucked up
=========
Brevity may be the soul of wit, but to twit without wit is soulless -- Johanne Savoie
-head shake-
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Thu, 06/23/2011 - 12:13am.
For years now Dunn, Magera and their league of infantiles have been challenging Death in every possible way. From Margera's schocked reaction I deduce that in doing so they never thought they could actually DIE. So instead of being heroic, they were just plain morronic. Pay it forward to teenage boys everywhere and thank God that Dunn kicked the bucket before he could cause serious 'collateral damage'.
*********************************************
Amen! I'm so sick and tired of these eternal fratboys and their antics.
Let's call what they're doing for what it is - extremely stupid. I think they're all oxygen thieves.
Submitted by tomahawk on Thu, 06/23/2011 - 12:24am.
Oh, have they? Especially the original CKY crew? I think you never really saw Jackass, right?
Yep, I saw numerous episodes and their antics still don't impress me much. Then again, I'm a lover of men, not little boys who refuse to grow up.
------------------------------------------------------------
Who are you calling silly cow?
By seeking cheap fame and fast fortune conducting drunken jackassery for a living, then morons like Ryan Dunn and Bam Margera shouldn't expect sympathy from the world when they get burned.
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Thu, 06/23/2011 - 12:13am.
For years now Dunn, Magera and their league of infantiles have been challenging Death in every possible way.
------
Oh, have they? Especially the original CKY crew? I think you never really saw Jackass, right?
I'm no fan of the show either, but most of the reactions (worldwide) (and written by women) are way over the top.
For years now Dunn, Magera and their league of infantiles have been challenging Death in every possible way. From Margera's schocked reaction I deduce that in doing so they never thought they could actually DIE. So instead of being heroic, they were just plain morronic. Pay it forward to teenage boys everywhere and thank God that Dunn kicked the bucket before he could cause serious 'collateral damage'.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Who are you calling silly cow?
Submitted by TimC on Thu, 06/23/2011 - 12:02am.
130 MPH? That was no accident, that was intentional murder/suicide.
--------------------------
He certainly has engaged in some truly self-destructive behaviors.
130 MPH? That was no accident, that was intentional murder/suicide.
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 10:27pm.
is that what you ladies are calling it now? the mouse button?
glad i could help you *refresh* & sorry for the finger cramps, loving on me has it's price.
tell me more ....
------
Lick my shoes, guido. You reek of The Situation fanboy-ism ten thousand kilometers away.
well, love, the night draws to a close for me but in keeping with your spirited and frisky self, i shall grab hold of my joystick and *refresh* myself as i lay me down, thinking excitedly of you and your militant "mouse button".
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
is that what you ladies are calling it now? the mouse button?
glad i could help you *refresh* & sorry for the finger cramps, loving on me has it's price.
tell me more ....
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 10:15pm.
for you, ese, absolutely
-------------------------------
thanky!... i'd hate to go cross-eyed, and miss anything... tragic, it would be!LOL!
-----------------------------
"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 10:14pm.
And I had to double post over you.
oh i'm terribly sorry. did you get cramps, love?
------
Your stupid self did give me a finger cramp from hitting the mouse button to refresh.
for you, ese, absolutely.
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
And I had to double post over you.
oh i'm terribly sorry. did you get cramps, love?
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:58pm.
no, seriously... the block lettering is killin' my eyes... please stop...
...carry on with your argument.
-----------------------------
"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
And I had to double post over you.
no shit again. it's from a great book i must recommend to you, lover. -a confederacy of dunces.
when you reach the part where ignatious reminisces (and waxes fondly) about his dog, please think of me.
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
From the notes of Captain Obvious... it was more than common sense that he was drunk, besides being stupid. What a tragic combo.
I wonder what other excuses and stories the jackass fan base is going to fabricate to make it seem less wrong and fucked up.
**************
-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
GO TEAM DARWIN! ... If you're taking requests, Lohan next, please.
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:58pm.
*kisses back*
an asswipe? how kind but it's okay, i'll leave your saliva on my sweetcheeks
-----
Your signature is stupider than you are.
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:55pm.
*kisses*
------
Keep your mouth off of me.
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:52pm.
*kisses*
------
Asswipe.
*kisses back*
an asswipe? how kind but it's okay, i'll leave your saliva on my sweetcheeks
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen, sanitation officials and super martian robot girl.
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:50pm.
-----
Sweetcheeks you wish.
she's uneccessarily angry over shit that happened 4 or 5 hours ago (and not to her). she's on high alert with a borderline militant feminism agenda. she's picked me to harp on. and harp on. and harp on (and is probably pissed in a femi-nazi way that i said "harp"). she claims she wants nothing to do with me. but yet she imagines me right down to jewelry.
and she keeps on keeping on.
"love is in the air ... doo dooo doo doooo dooooo"
myrna baby, where you been?
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:45pm.
let me sum it up in one word: obsession
-----
One word: idiot.
Oh yeah, I want you. I can tell by your meaty avatar you must be a man with a big package and that alone makes me forget who I am and I want nothing more than to just rip off my clothes and do you. Forget you are a huge idiot for thinking it is hilarity to break a thread 3 or 4 times with stupid bold and/or italics. Because I said so much and I am female, that can only mean I want you SO bad.
But I am not in 4th grade (to YOUR disappointment) and if something grates me, I will say so. Doesn't mean I want to jump your bone. God forbid one female isn't smitten with your genius self. This seems to crush your ego.
I made a valid point that you are an idiot and now you want to attack me. I can't imagine you are anything less than New Jersey Guido trash. And whether you are or are not, do not let me know because it is comical in my mind to imagine you as such.
let me sum it up in one word: obsession
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:34pm.
Sensitive baby I wanna sing you a lullaby and coddle you to sleep. Not. Douche. Are you a gold chain proud guido?
no shit huh.
you come out of nowhere, fucking with me claiming absurdly that i'm fucking with you and you want it stopped THEN claim that i make no sense when it's you not making sense ... and, yet, you just keep fucking with me.
oh fuck. i have seen this before, in 4th grade. you must have a fucking crush on me.
------
Oh yeah, I want you. I can tell by your meaty avatar you must be a man with a big package and that alone makes me forget who I am and I want nothing more than to just rip off my clothes and do you. Forget you are a huge idiot for thinking it is hilarity to break a thread 3 or 4 times with stupid bold and/or italics. Because I said so much and I am female, that can only mean I want you SO bad.
But I am not in 4th grade (to YOUR disappointment) and if something grates me, I will say so. Doesn't mean I want to jump your bone. God forbid one female isn't smitten with your genius self. This seems to crush your ego.
I made a valid point that you are an idiot and now you want to attack me. I can't imagine you are anything less than New Jersey Guido trash. And whether you are or are not, do not let me know because it is comical in my mind to imagine you as such.
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:17pm.
hope it doesn't go "Star 80" (Dorothy Stratton), but we'll see as this develops, and it will because I suspect some major fame whoring from Courtney. I read that Tooms is older than his bride's father.
_______________________________
I can see this exact scenario happening. The whole situation is gross and, mark my words, (wags index finger like my mama, her mama, and her mama's mama before her), no good will come of it.
(This statement is far more compelling if read in an Irish brogue accompanied by an all-knowing backward head-tilt, and ending with a drawn-out intake of breath through the nose).
dp!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 7:16pm.
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 7:03pm.
EC and Centy - all joking aside, I think it's really cool that you're both able to hash out differences. I enjoy reading both of your comments because you two are always insightful, intelligent and funny (if occasionally irreverent, which makes the comments even more fun).
Hey, wait a minute! You're not the same poster using alts, are you? Because that would be too much (trys to keep head from exploding).
IMHO, I always respect someone who's mature enough to say "I'm sorry", as well as the person who has the ability to laugh at themselves.
Please keep posting, both of you. You guys make these threads fun to read.
****************************
Thank you CSG! I like you too, and really enjoy your humor! PIMP!
The one thing I have learned as I have matured into my 70's, is that there is nothing wrong with losing your temper, and there is nothing wrong in admitting when you are a bitch and totally off the charts crazy. I never said sorry when I was younger, because even if I knew I was wrong and wanted to apologize, I always felt it was a weakness. Now I view being able to see when your wrong a strength. Sometimes my apologies come a little late, after time spent thinking about what a douche bag I have been, but they do come eventually.
________________________________
Well said, EC...well said.
As far as my apologies go, they either come pretty quickly or don't come at all (much like my men!).
Anyone who gets an apology from me deserves it, people who do not do not deserve it, because they are playing me.
It's possible people who are nice to me now, like in the past, are playing me too, but I will always be nice to people who are nice to me.
There is a little place in my black and hardened heart that still tells me that people are inherently good.
I hope I never lose that!
Good night, C.
PS -- You are not 70. I recognize that that's not a good sign.
_________________________________
GERONIMO!
i'm simmah.
just trying to figure out love's complexities is all.
ETA: ... this might be my myrna minkoff after all.
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
Sensitive baby I wanna sing you a lullaby and coddle you to sleep. Not. Douche. Are you a gold chain proud guido?
no shit huh.
you come out of nowhere, fucking with me claiming absurdly that i'm fucking with you and you want it stopped THEN claim that i make no sense when it's you not making sense ... and, yet, you just keep fucking with me.
oh fuck. i have seen this before, in 4th grade. you must have a fucking crush on me.
-like a bitch in heat, i seem to attract a coterie of policemen and sanitation officials. -JKT
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:11pm.
OMG... I've never done the d&d thing. But, look at the impact it has had.
Sweetas, I just want to tell you that your winning caption about the ruby slurpers had kept me going, lol, for weeks!
It really was perfection.
Thanks.
_________________________________
GERONIMO!
All right now, kids, simmah down, simmah down.
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:04pm.
I also think you take dlisted too seriously and type with fists of flaming rage so you scare me a little. Leave me alone.
Submitted by Meatblocks on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:04pm.
Hey get outta my face.
yeah, as soon as i pull your extraineous shit outta my ass.
-----
That doesn't even make sense.
it means i didn't need your uneccessary shit up or on my backside and that it was you in my face, not the other way around so if you want steppin off you are gonna have to do it yourself or have me pull you the fuck off.
oh wait. i see the problem. that's not an earring hanging from your ear, it's a light chain.
*pulls chain*
there. now you are ON.
-----
Sensitive baby I wanna sing you a lullaby and coddle you to sleep. Not. Douche. Are you a gold chain proud guido?
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:12pm.
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:02pm.
Bitch looks like John Holmes fluff girl from the 70s. Sixteen my ass. I believe their story. Their delusions about love and one another is something that I can feed on and mock endlessly.
___________________________
I would love to see it mocked endlessly, but I'm getting a "murder/suicide" vibe from that couple that says it's not going to end well.
=====================
Yeah, Tooms is creepy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_egDyfSves
I hope it doesn't go "Star 80" (Dorothy Stratton), but we'll see as this develops, and it will because I suspect some major fame whoring from Courtney. I read that Tooms is older than his bride's father.
Chiri!!!!! omg *haz happy monkey timez witchou*
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:09pm.
movin' to OP.... don't wanna piss people off too much... next selection there in a minute
OT: still got nothing
-----------------------------
"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
Diddy should do an all-male cast of "The Color Purple." Ice Cube is Celie, Ice T is Shug Avery, Tracy Morgan is Sofia ("Harpo, who dat gay?"), T.I. is Squeak, and Diddy can play Mister.
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 06/22/2011 - 9:02pm.
Bitch looks like John Holmes fluff girl from the 70s. Sixteen my ass. I believe their story. Their delusions about love and one another is something that I can feed on and mock endlessly.
___________________________
I would love to see it mocked endlessly, but I'm getting a "murder/suicide" vibe from that couple that says it's not going to end well.