So. Gillian Anderson and The Crown creator Peter Morgan broke up in mid-December after dating for four years. Then, last month, it was revealed that Peter, 57, had quickly moved on to his friend, 47-year-old TV producer/heiress Jemima Goldsmith, which allegedly left Gillian, 52, “bemused.” You may remember Jemima as Jemima Khan, ex-wife of former cricket star/current Prime Minister of Pakistan Imran Khan, and ex-girlfriend to Hugh Grant and Russell Brand. Jemima’s very rich, bitch. And now you can add “shocked and confused” to her descriptors, cuz Peter has abruptly left her to get back together with Gillian Anderson. That dirty dog!
Welp, Cardi B has filed documents to officially call off her divorce from Offset. Which makes these on-and-off spouses the official 21st century version of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. Sorry Brad and Jen, ya missed your chance! This is the second time Cardi called take backs on divorcing Offset. They broke up at the end of 2018 due to his wandering peen and reconciled in January 2019. But last time Cardi didn’t get as far as filing divorce papers, so this is the first time she’s legally saying, “I want you back, baby!” But wait! Cardi filed her dismissal “without prejudice”, meaning she can reserve the right to refile at a later date. My money’s on next August. Summer’s for side chicks.
Drew Barrymore’s fuckery-filled daytime talk show just finished up its second week. And yesterday, Drew invited her former husband of 15 months, Tom Green, onto the socially distanced set of her show to catch up on old times. And it was as awkward and cute as you can imagine two exes reuniting on a daytime talk show would be.
Last time on “Keeping Up with the Kardashian-West Marriage Krisis”, Kim Kardashian was still on the fence about splitting from Kanye West. After he ignored her calls for a month, Kim flew out to her husband’s compound in Wyoming, allegedly with the intention of ending things. Did the kouple rekonnect in Kowboy Kountry? Or did Kim realize it wasn’t a good look to divorce someone in the middle of a very public breakdown? Either way, these two are giving it another shot.
Kim, Kanye, and their four kids jumped on their private jet and flew to an island outside of America. TMZ says they wanted “an appropriate setting to try and save their marriage”. And, here’s the kicker (brace yourself)… there will be NO PHOTOS. No selfies, no reality TV cameras, no paps. Jesus Christ. If a Kardashian doesn’t get filmed, does she even exist? My money’s on Kim fading away like Marty McFly in Back to the Future.
It is our patriotic duty to keep abreast of any developments pertaining to Kanye West, who despite recent distractions, is still, according to TMZ, running for President of the United States. So like it or not, we are in for a penny, in for a pound (or more accurately in for $.02 given Kanye’s propensity for rounding up). While Donda: With Child’s water still hasn’t broken yet (what’s he even paying you for, Donda’s doula?), there has been some progress made at Kanye’s Wyoming ranch. According to People, Kanye finally agreed to receive his wife Kim Kardashian. But instead of letting her inside the compound to grab a sandwich or a coffee so they could talk in private, the two headed out to Wendy’s and had an argument in the car in front of the paparazzi.
Because there’s nothing else going on during this never-ending pandemic hellscape, Katie Couric hosted a throwback Zoom reunion of The Parent Trap. Ahem, the The Parent Trap *remake* from 1998. Not the 1961 original. That particular reunion would consist of 74-year-old Hayley Mills talking to a mirror, because most of that cast is dancing to “Let’s Get Together” in heaven.
Here’s who showed up: actors Lindsay Lohan (wow, what a get!) Dennis Quaid, Elaine Hendrix, Lisa Ann Walter, Simon Kunz, director Nancy Meyers and writer-producer Charles Shyer. Since network television is totally over, it was hosted by Katie on her Instagram page.