Members of the pro-shorts army better put on their best pair of scrappin’ shorts and get ready for another battle, because Natalie Portman has joined Fran Lebowitz in the war against shorts. GOOP’S ambassador to France Natalie Portman did an interview with the Wisconsin Gazette (via Bustle and Lainey) to promote some Miss Dior shit and her movie Knight of Cups, and she got into talking about what it’s like living in Paris with her twirling ballet dancer husband and their son Aleph. When Natalie Portman skips down the street in Paris singing “Bonjour, Paree!” from Funny Face (which you know she does because trick thinks she’s our modern day Audrey Hepburn) with a baguette in her arms and a beret on her head, she doesn’t have to worry about her eyes being hit with the sight of French legs sprouting out of tacky shorts. Le trashé!
It’s so interesting to plunge into another culture and experience a different way of living. The city is so rich in terms of the architecture, the bookshops you find at every corner, the way everyone dresses so well. No Parisian ever walks around in shorts and even the children look very chic (laughs).
The closest I’ve been to being in Paris is the time I ate French onion soup and a crow-sawnt at a Mimi’s Cafe outside of Lake Perris, CA, so I have no idea if she’s dribbling out the truth or not. But I do wish that Parisians would secretly gather together and agree to wear shorts on the same day. Natalie’s mind would be blown across the Atlantic. I’m not sure if I totally believe Natalie, because one of my style icons is French and his ass is always SANS PANTS!
Explain that, Natalie!
Here’s Natalie with her son last year and yes, she’s wearing cut-offs, but it’s okay since these pictures were taken in the uncouth land of déclassé known as L.A. When in Paris, don’t wear shorts! When in L.A. , look like trash!
Social commentator and author Fran Lebowitz talked to Elle about the current state of style and the entire interview is hilarious. It’s like talking to your crabby auntie who wears the same white button down and black skirt to family reunions and sits in the corner nibbling on Royal Dansk cookies while making stank face. Fran thinks yoga pants are destroying women, believes ladies can learn from drag queens, thinks NYC is suffering from a mirror drought (because so many people are walking around looking a mess) and says that a man in shorts is one of the most terrifying things to happen to her eyes. Auntie Fran’s got some fightin’ words!