Category: Gavin Rossdale

Random Burped Up A New Couple: Gavin Rossdale And Elin Nordegren

September 7, 2016 / Posted by:

The last time I wrote about the Pope of Gold Diggers, Elin Nordegren, she was supposedly dropping her million dollar poon onto the billion dollar peen belonging to the opulent human form of a Dynasty episode. Tiger Wood’s ex was dating Palm Beach tycoon Chris Cline, and many of us were hoping that she would achieve Gold Digging Saint status by marrying him without a prenup and later getting a giant chunk of his billion dollar fortune in a divorce settlement. That didn’t happen, and over three years later, she may have decided to do a little charity work by slumming it with poor peasant Gavin Rossdale.

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Gwen Stefani Says Her And Blake Shelton’s Flirting On “The Voice” Was Definitely Played Up Through Editing

August 4, 2016 / Posted by:

It’s been a whole month since Gwen Stefani last spoke publicly about her divorce from Gavin Rossdale and rebound relationship with Blake Shelton. So we were due for another interview. Gwen is once again pulling back the curtain on her personal life (a curtain which no doubt hanging from nothing but threads from pulling it back and forth so often). This time Gwen spoke to Cosmopolitan and she admitted that NBC may have played up her totally authentic relationship with Blake on The Voice. No. You don’t say?

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Gwen Stefani Talks Divorce, Again

July 6, 2016 / Posted by:

I love the late summer/early fall push magazines make because it means more ads. And more ads means more of those fold-out perfume things, which is always the icing on the cake for a night out. It also means they get big celebs pushing whatever it is they want to hawk. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know that Gwen Stefani has mostly been selling us her and Blake Shelton‘s romance, and by proxy, her latest album. Well, she’s at it again!

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Gavin Rossdale Isn’t Crazy About Blake Shelton Hanging Out With His Kids

May 27, 2016 / Posted by:

I know this could literally be a picture of any family at The Cheesecake Factory, but it’s not. The giant in jeans and cowboy boots on the left is Blake Shelton. The blonde on the right is Gwen Stefani. The tiny humans gathered around her are her children. This picture makes me angry, because the closest Cheesecake Factory to me is a two hour drive away. It also makes Gavin Rossdale angry, but it has nothing to do with the fact that he isn’t currently eating a plate of Chicken Bellagio.

According to In Touch, Gwen’s ex-husband isn’t happy that she has brought their three kids into her questionably-authentic relationship with Blake Shelton. A source claims that Gavin isn’t exactly here for Gwen and Blake’s relationship to begin with, which is fine, because I don’t think anybody really gets the warm fuzzies when they see their ex gushing over someone new. But he’s especially not here for Gwen’s new boyfriend getting all “Y’all critters can call me Uncle Blakey” with their sons Kingston, Zuma, and Apollo Rossdale. The source says:

“Gavin doesn’t agree with [Gwen] having a relationship with Blake, and he doesn’t like her bringing the kids around him.”

Well that’s kind of rich coming from the guy who was introduced to his side-piece through his kids. As for why he’s so worried about Blake showing up to soccer practice and tagging along on Cheesecake Factory night, a source tells E! News that it’s probably because he’s not thinking about much else these days.

“All Gavin is concerned about right now is protecting his kids. He is a fantastic father and his kids have been going through a hard time.”

I don’t know if Gavin needs to stress so much about his kids hanging out with Mommy’s new boyfriend. Who knows? Maybe she didn’t introduce him as her boyfriend. Maybe her kids just know him as “Mommy’s special country singing TV friend” who comes over to the house and “promote each other’s new albums” in the office. I’d say that’s the power of the innocence of children, but to be honest, I’m pretty sure that’s all they’re doing.

Pic: Splash

Gavin Rossdale And Gwen Stefani’s Divorce Settled And He’s Not Getting Half Of Their Millions

April 14, 2016 / Posted by:

When Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale’s marriage bit the dust a little over eight months ago, it was revealed that they didn’t have a prenup. Eight months was technically more than enough time for Gwen to track down the shadiest divorce lawyers a famous rich person could buy and plot a way to keep as much of the cash she made during their 13-year-long marriage. But she didn’t have to do that. TMZ says Gwen and Gavin have finally settled their divorce, and Gavin is walking away with far less than he’s entitled to.

A few months after they split, a source told TMZ that Gavin was planning on playing nice and wouldn’t be sucking her bank account dry. Or at least as dry as a 50/50 split would get him. Gavin could have taken half of Gwen’s shit, but sources tell TMZ he nodded his head “yes” to far less than that. They’ve agreed on a lopsided split of their properties, with Gwen getting the larger share. Gavin didn’t push for a settlement check either. TMZ doesn’t say whether or not he got any money from Gwen as a parting gift, but they do know he isn’t currently diving into a pool of coins, Scrooge McDuck-style.

They also agreed to split custody of their three children, Kingston, Zuma, and Apollo, with Gavin getting just a tiny bit more time with them because of Gwen’s touring schedule. However, Gavin didn’t ask for any child support, and he won’t be getting any. Although I’m sure Gwen will still kick in a couple hundred dollars here and there for hair bleaching and fedoras.

This might be one of the more reasonable famous people splits in the history of famous people splits. If the Grinch moved from Whoville to Beverly Hills and focused his attention from Christmas to celebrity divorce settlements, this would be the part where he turns to a confused Max (who is now a blonde Botoxed poodle) and asks: “No screaming? No shouting? No social media snapping? How can two famous people get divorced without slapping?

Pic: Splash

Gwen Stefani Might Be A Zombie

March 19, 2016 / Posted by:

There is dark magic in this world. Magic one must never toy with. Just ask Mauro Oliveira. He’ll tell you all about the evil witch Boreza. Today’s treacherous journey into the dark arts heads straight into The Serpent and the Rainbow territory. We’re talking zombies. Some possibly voodoo shit. Gwen Stefani is out pushing her new album, This Is What The Truth Feels Like, and she’s dropping some not so subtle hints that she may in fact be undead. Earlier in the week, USA Today necromanced an interview with her about no good, sass-a-frassin’ Gavin Rossdale and the main quote from it is what brings us to this strange and dark land:

 “I was dead. I was literally dead, like panicking – like anyone would be.”

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