Wonky Sues Again!

/ September 7, 2007
 
Paris Hilton's lawyers have filed a Federal lawsuit against Hallmark for using her picture and trademarked catchphrase "That's Hot" for a $2.49 greeting card.  Wonk wants $500,000 in damages and an injunction barring Hallmark from further exploitation of her name and likeness.
 
One of the cards is called the "waitress" card and features Paris serving some dude breakfast while saying "That's Hot." Click here to see it.
 
She should sue herself for further exploiting her skank ass. Actually, we should sue her for forcing us to look at her wonk face! It's also seriously disgusting that she trademarked "That's Hot." I know bitches that have been using that for years.  
 
Image: Splash
 
 
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Daddy Wants The Dough

/ September 7, 2007
 
Amy Wino's daddy, Mitch Wino, wants her to sign over all her cash to him. He believes that if he cuts off her drug money it will help her get clean. Mitch is also speaking with attorneys to try and find a way to keep Wino's husband, Blake, away from her money.
 
Reportedly Blake currently handles all of her money and has even told friends that he might start managing her career soon. Blake did not sign a pre-nup with Wino.
 
It's been reported that she's worth around $10 Million, but could earn as much as $20 Million in the next couple of years from her second album.
 
Mitch was overheard telling a friend, “It makes me sick, he's the reason she'll die. I'm not going to see him get everything that she worked so hard for,” 
 
I got to hand it to Mitch. At least he's trying everything he can to protect her…or is he? White Oprah has made me so skeptical of showbiz parents.
 
Above is Wino leaving McDonald's in London yesterday. Yeah, she probably only ordered a Diet Coke. Hmmm…now I want McDonald's. There worm burgers are delicious! Seriously, someone told me that shit is made of worms! 
 
Image: Splash
 
 
 
 
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Afternoon Crumbs

/ September 7, 2007
 
Victoria Silvstedt is meeeeellllttting – Hollywood Rag 
 
Asshole Simpson's face is doing weird things – Hollywood Tuna 
 
Criss Angel is using Brit Brit…of course he is – IDLYITW 
 
That's not lipstick, that's wet paint (NSFW) – Drunken Stepfather 
 
Angie and Zahara's matching bags – Just Jared 
 
Madge pissess off the WintourA Socialite's Life 
 
Mary-Kate Olsen plays dress-up – Popsugar 
 
Hilarious dog videosCityrag 
 
Christina Ricci's alien nipples – Egotastic! 
 
Robot Cat is not cute – Gigglesugar
 
 
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I’m So Going To Watch This

/ September 7, 2007
 
MySpace star, sometimes recording artist and straight-up HO, Tila Tequila, got herself a reality dating show on MTV. Tila announced on her MySpace yesterday that the show will follow her as she finds love among dudes and chicks, because she is not strictly dickly. 
 
My new reality show on MTV will be like NO OTHER SHOW ON TELEVISION HISTORY! My show is about finding true love, because for me….having over 2 million friends is cool but sometimes it makes it hard for me to find someone real, and someone whom I can trust and love…..but there is a catch…..the show will be about me finding love as a BISEXUAL!!!!! THAT IS CRAZY RIGHT? So on my new reality show there will be 16 male contestants and 16 female contestants all fighting for my love….the only twist is….yes, there is another twist….the only twist is that these guys and these girls have NO IDEA that I am bisexual and that they are competing against each others sexes!!! GUYS AGAINST GIRLS….WHO WILL I END UP HOOKING UP WITH????? WILL I BE STRAIGHT OR LESBIAN IN THE END?????
 
Even though I will most likely catch some strange and rare monkey STD from watching this, I will take my chances.
 
"WILL I BE STRAIGHT OR LESBIAN IN THE END???"
 
I think that's my life motto now. It makes so much sense.  
 
 
 
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Ka-Razy!!

/ September 7, 2007
 
Lauryn Hill needs professional help. At least that's what her Fugees group member, Wyclef Jean, told MTV.
 
When he was asked about a possible reunion he said, "The first thing that needs to happen…is after my psychiatric evaluation. 'Lauryn Hill… Mrs Hill… The Hill… – Should go see a psychiatrist – period – Just seek help!"
 
Wyclef isn't the only Fugees member that thinks homegirl needs a dose of  reality. Last month Pras said, 'Before I work with Lauryn Hill again, you will have a better chance of seeing Osama Bin Laden and George W. Bush in Starbucks having a latte.'

'At this point I really think it will take an act of God to change her, because she is that far out there.'

I guess the outside matches the inside. Here I thought she was just playing crazy for her "art." There's nothing wrong with insanity. It's ok Miss Hill, those boys can't handle the cuckoo. 

Is it just me or does she look like a younger Oprah in that Clockwork Crazy pic above? 

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