King Charles Gets Dragged For Asking British Subjects To Recite An Oath To Him On Coronation Day, And He May Be Hiding His “Sausage Fingers” In Pictures
Hundreds of years ago, if you wanted the throne, you’d have to kill some people for it, but in 2023 all King Charles needs to do is kill his image. The long, almost never-ending road leading up to King Charles’ coronation has been fraught with bumps- from Prince Harry’s messy tell-all book to Prince Andrew simply existing. And now, Charles is yet again in the thick of it after The Palace asked the British people to recite a “Homage of the People” oath to their new king from their couch or on the streets on Coronation Day. Good luck with that, Chuck. But there is a chance that some of King Charles’ haters will be chanting, “Down with Sausage Fingers,” instead because some think that he’s been hiding his fingers in pictures after people continually made fun of them.
The oath announcement was rolled out by the office of the Archbishop of Canterbury, who, after getting dragged by the public, backtracked by calling it more of an “invitation” than a “request.” According to The Daily Mail:
Furious royal aides fear the backlash over the invitation for people to swear allegiance to King Charles is casting a cloud over the Coronation, it is reported.
Officials were forced to leap into action over the weekend after the office for the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, called millions of citizens to ‘pay homage’ to the new monarch.
Lambeth Palace quickly had to clarify the ‘Homage of the People’ was an ‘invitation’ for people to vocally offer their ‘true allegiance’ to the monarch and his heirs, rather than an ‘expectation or request’.
Republican groups had jumped on the announcement, calling it ‘ an offensive and tone-deaf gesture that holds the people in contempt’.
And the backlash from what is believed to have been an attempt to make the historic ceremony more accessible has caused consternation at Buckingham Palace, according to reports.
The order of service will read: ‘All who so desire, in the Abbey, and elsewhere, say together: I swear that I will pay true allegiance to Your Majesty, and to your heirs and successors according to law. So help me God.’
A rep from the Archbishop’s residence, Lambeth Palace, defended the idea, voicing, ‘Our hope is at that point, when the archbishop invites people to join in, that people wherever they are, if they’re watching at home on their own, watching the telly, will say it out loud – this sense of a great cry around the nation and around the world of support for the King.’
Charles was already in the dog house after it surfaced that he spent a whopping £8 million in taxpayer money, clearly feeling himself a little too much with his newfound BKE (big king energy). Considering local councils are raising taxes and cutting public services, this purchase was…a choice. Charles had to wait his whole damn life- up until the near end of it- to get crowned king. So for him, “approval rating” is just another crossword.
And about King Charles’ sausage fingers shame, the Palace recently released two new pictures of him. Most people probably wouldn’t think any of the pics, but some noticed that King Charles is hiding his hands in his pic with Queen Camilla and has one hand in his pocket in the other pic:
Page Six says that some (bored) people think that Charles is hiding his fingers because he’s been bullied into doing so:
In light of his apparent decision to conceal his digits, fans have spoken out against the treatment Charles, 74, has received over his hands, which are puffy because of an undisclosed medical condition.
“I want to abolish the monarchy but I do still feel bad that we have gang bullied a grown man into never showing his hands again,” a follower commented.
“I can’t believe Twitter has bullied the literal king into never showing his hands,” tweeted another.
“Show us his hands cowards,” replied another.
King Charles ‘bullied’ out of showing ‘sausage fingers’ in new portraits https://t.co/hKvhGEUq9d pic.twitter.com/Iklb2Dy3TL
— New York Post (@nypost) May 2, 2023
The Daily Star talked to a doctor about this highly important story, and they said there ” aren’t any immediate health concerns to be concluded from swollen fingers and is most likely a sign of his age.” And according to Huffington Post UK, Charles himself dubbed his fingers “sausage fingers” in a letter to a friend in 1982, which is weird. Because you’d think that Charles would dub them “tampon fingers” instead!