Open Post: Hosted By Gym Bros Eating Dog Food For Protein

March 18, 2023 / Posted by:

Going to the gym is hard. You gotta find the right place that meets your needs, find the right time to go, figure out the right workout routine, and eat the right foods to support your healthy lifestyle. The rewards, like a better quality of life, are pretty cool, but sometimes waking up at 6 am to go to a spin class where an impossibly fit lady with a serial killer smile shouts at you to go faster makes you second guess if it’s all worth it. That is if you’re normal. Other people like to make their fitness life as harrowing as possible. Take, for instance, “fitness influencers” who decided that because of the high levels of protein in it, dog food would be a good option for gym gains. It’s like the Tide Pod thing but instead of Zoomers, it’s gym bros.

It is a known fact that dogs need protein. It is also a known fact that humans need protein. What happens when you put those two facts in front of a gym bro? They start eating dog food! Such was the case with Henry Clarisey. He decided to impart his brilliant insight onto TikTok and share his experience of eating Kibbles ’n Bits’ Oven Roasted Beef with Spring Vegetable and Apple Flavors. Apparently, it’s got more protein than one whole meathead at the squat rack! via Buzzfeed News:

…in his first viral TikTok video with 19.9 million views, he tells viewers that, according to an app, Pedigree’s dog food has 666 grams of protein  — around 600 grams more than the amount of protein most people should consume each day.

Clarisey promised viewers he would try dog food if his video got 15,000 likes. After posting, his video got 2.5 million likes — “I knew I needed to try it,” he told BuzzFeed News.

Here’s Henry’s eureka moment:

#stitch with @kizaru.adm #fyp #fitness #bodybuilding #physique #creatine #gym #dogfood #viral

♬ original sound – Henryfit

Unfortunately for Henry, the human palate is just a tad more sophisticated than a Jack Russell’s. Shockingly, the fitness influencer discovered dog food tastes bad!

Replying to @kenton916 ❗️trying the dog food❗️#fyp #fitness #bodybuilding #physique #creatine #gym #dogfood #viral

♬ Blade Runner 2049 – Synthwave Goose

He further described to Buzzfeed News what was that made him retch into a toilet.

“The dog food tasted extremely dry. Needed so much water after eating it,” Clarisey said in an email to BuzzFeed News. “Tasted like little pieces of dirt and I definitely don’t think it was worth it. Even though it’s a lot of protein, I’d take steak or protein powder.”

Although Henry has rejected the dog food shortcut, there’s no stopping another fitness influencer from coming up with the idea of selling dog food protein shakes. Just make it into an app somehow, market it to other gym bros, and voilà, the next Silicon Valley million-dollar startup idea!

Pic: TikTok

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