Hot Slut Of The Day!

January 3, 2023 / Posted by:

Millenios!

The days leading up to the end of the 1900s were filled with drama since we were told that computer systems were in danger of completely freaking out from making the switch from the two-digit year ’99 to ’00, and the world as we knew it would end! But the only thing that crashed that night was me after getting blackout drunk from two cups of Strawberry Hill (listen, the late-90s was my extreme lightweight era). So when every computer in the land didn’t explode when the clock struck midnight on January 1, 2000, everybody kissed their box of Millenios before letting out a Y2K sigh of relief!

In 1999, General Mills got into the Y2K stunt foolery by spinning off Cheerios into limited-edition Millenios, which sounds like what you call orgasms made by Millenials. Millenios were just like Cheerios, only they were sweetened with brown sugar and featured a 2-shaped Cheerio. Mr. Breakfast says that General Mills launched the “official cereal of Millenium” during Dick Clark’s Rockin’ Eve on December 31, 1999. General Mills must have been so blinded and slobbery with excitement over this stunt that they didn’t bother to do any fact-checking about the millennium. Because if they did, they’d find out that their “official cereal of the Millenium” stunt was a year too early since the new millennium didn’t officially begin until 2001. But again, we all thought the world would end at the start of 2000 (not really), so General Mills probably burped up their millennial Cheerios while they still could! Here’s more info about Millenios from Mr. Breakfast:

Millenios was a limited edition Cheerios cereal with traditional donut-shaped Cheerios pieces and new whole-grain pieces shaped like the number “2”. The text on the box read, “once in a lifetime” and “brown sugar sweetened whole grain oat and corn cereal”.

The back panel suggested, “Create your own time capsule with this box” and included the following text:

Now’s your chance to be part of history. Use this collectors Millenios box as your own unique time capsule to store your special mementos. We’ve provided some ideas to get you started, but use your imagination and leave behind a memory to share in the future!

eBay is currently filled with auctions for unopened boxes of Millenios, and surprisingly, they don’t go for thousands of dollars each. They go for under $20 a box. A steal! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go buy up all the boxes of Millenios on eBay, take a picture of the Millenios in a 2022 formation, and re-market that shit as an extremely limited edition cereal called OdeTo2022-ios. And don’t worry, they’re still “fresh.”

Pic: eBay

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