It’s always a fun time when two of the world’s foremost nepo babies of privilege can get together for a little chat about love, life, and whatever else they tend to discuss. As always, Gwyneth Paltrow is leaning on one of her rich and uninteresting friends to appear on her GOOP podcast. This time she invited Kim Kardashian, who has been making her podcast rounds as of late because attention is her best friend. And although Kim’s face is slowly morphing into Cher’s her real icon must be Elizabeth Taylor because Kim admits even after her doomed marriage to Kanye West, she’s taking a few years off before heading down the aisle for the fourth time.
Gwyneth isn’t exactly Barbara Walters so she didn’t ask Kim important questions like, “If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?” and instead asked Kim if she’s interested in getting herself a fourth ex-husband. via People:
Paltrow, 50, began the hour-long interview expressing that she is “so interested” in how Kardashian works internally and less interested about the “world’s reaction” to her.
While talking about marriage and kids, Paltrow asked point blank if the SKIMS founder would wed again.
“I don’t know,” Kardashian said at first, agreeing with Paltrow that she’s “such a romantic.” She went on to admit, “I am. I am. I have this fantasy in my head, like fourth’s time’s a charm, it’s gonna — it’s gonna work out.”
No, Kim, the saying is “Third time’s a charm,” and there was nothing charming about your third marriage to Kanye. And even though we can all agree that their union was an unholy mess of fame and fuckery, Kim still looks upon it as an example of what a real marriage should look like.
“I feel, like honestly, my last marriage was my first real [one] — the first one [to Damon Thomas], I just don’t know what was happening,” Kardashian told Paltrow. “The second one [to Kris Humphries], I felt like I wanted to be married so badly because all my friends were at that place and that’s where I should have been, and I didn’t accept that that just wasn’t where I was and realized that that was okay.”
“And now, I feel like I would definitely take my time — and I would be okay for a forever partnership as well,” she added. “I would want a marriage, but I’m so happy to take my time.”
Most of us would have fallen asleep by now but not Gwyneth. She continued stroking Kim’s ego with words of praise, claiming she doesn’t really care about Kim’s public persona since she’s more impressed with her business accomplishments. Kim also said she hopes she can shake the public’s image of her, which is ironic since it’s the image she (and her
pimp mother) created for the world.
“I don’t know how to get myself out of the narrative — and just keep my head down and stay focused,” she said as Paltrow commended her non-reactive personality and the fact that she’s a “free thinker.”
Kim, just do us all a favor and leave marriage to the professionals because there was a time when Pete Davidson was a potential candidate for husband number four. And if that’s how your dating trajectory will be from now on, then, you can’t be trusted with the sanctity of marriage ever again.