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Smackers Cosmic Nails!

Many of us who were around in the 80s and 90s and lived to tell the tale (listen, we’re lucky to be alive after inhaling all those clouds of AquaNet and riding in the back of our uncle’s pick-up truck like nothing), definitely remember the iconic Bonne Bell Lip Smackers, which still exist. But fewer people probably remember the time in the 90s when Bonne Bell decided that lips shouldn’t get all the fun, and so they made Lip Smackers for your nails. And that’s how Smackers Cosmic Nails came to be.

Twenty years after Bonne Bell completely REVOLUTIONIZED the lip chap industry with its flavored balm in 1973, it released Smackers Cosmic Nails. No, tweens in the 90s weren’t walking around with finger stubs after biting off their deliciously-flavored nails because, unlike Lip Smackers, Smacker Cosmic Nails weren’t flavored. They were scented. The scents included strawberry, grape, and more. Now, I thought that Cosmic Nails was a thing from the early-90s. But according to this WWD article from the late-90s, Bonne Bell debuted its Cosmic line in 1999, and it was meant for little kids. Okay, but tell that to the grown candy ravers of the late-90s and early aughts who definitely sniffed hard on Cosmic Nails fumes while rolling.

What is driving interest, he says, goes beyond Lip Smackers. Last year, Bonne Bell introduced Cosmic, a cosmetics line targeted at six-to-12-year-olds. Earlier this year, it extended its Bottled Emotion franchise from a simple fragrance collection to a full bath, body and cosmetics business.

Smackers Cosmic Nails didn’t last very long, and I think I know why. I mean, their targeted demographic was all wrong. They should’ve marketed it directly to immature teenage boys as an excuse for them to say, “Smell my fingers.”

Pic: Pinterest