Elon Musk Is Reportedly The Father Of Twins He Made With A Neuralink Executive

July 7, 2022 / Posted by:

Thoughts and prayers to the Neuralink employee who deals with public relations, because damn if they haven’t had an uphill battle. If it’s not having to respond to claims that their company can make a real-life dinosaur (it can’t), then it’s sweating over how you’re going to address whether or not a whole bunch of monkeys died during testing (they did). Silver lining, this latest PR nightmare doesn’t involve animals, unless you count Elon Musk, who might be breeding in a way that would have Bob Barker hissing, “Come on, what the fuck did I say about spaying and neutering your pets.” According to a recent report, Elon Musk and Neuralink executive, Shivon Zilis, welcomed twins last year.

51-year-old Elon Musk is already the father to numerous children. He shares five children with his first wife Justine Wilson, one set of twins and one set of triplets. In May 2020, Elon and Grimes welcomed a boy who would eventually be named X AE A-XII Musk, and a girl named Exa Dark Sideræl Musk, or Y for short, in December 2021. And just weeks before Baby Y was born, Busines Insider reports that Elon and Shivon welcomed their twins into the world. via CNN:

The outlet obtained court filings pertaining to changing the children’s legal names to incorporate the Musk last name, and Zilis’ as part of the middle names. CNN Business could not independently confirm the contents of the documents, but a Travis County, Texas court docket obtained by CNN Business indicated that the name change petition was initially filed in April 2022 and granted in early May – matching the dates on the documents published by Business Insider. Those documents contain the court’s stamp as well as Musk’s signature, listing him as the father and Zilis as the mother.

Something of note: all of Elon’s kids’ moms were born in Canada. Elon himself was born in South Africa, but his mother and 2022 Met Gala date Maye Musk was born in Canada. I’m sure that’s just a coincidence and not at all suspicious or weird.

Elon and Shivon reportedly met in 2015, and according to Shivon’s LinkedIn page, she’s worked for Tesla and Neuralink since May 2017, and currently works for the brain chip company Neuralink as director of operations and special projects. Um…currently works? Excuse me, but you allegedly have two babies that were made with Elon’s billionaire DNA. Shoot, maybe inflation is worse than we thought. I mean, even the mother of two billionaire twins is still out there busting ass at her 9-to-5 to make ends meet. Now I know why Elon wants everyone back in the office! It’s too hard to get your employees pregnant when they’re working from home. I just hope Elon is throwing Shivon a few extra dollars each month, especially considering how hard she’s simped for him over the years.

Elon seemed to confirm that he’s the Space Nick Cannon by getting into earth’s “underpopulation” problem:

As mentioned above, the twins were born in November 2021, just a few weeks before a surrogate gave birth to Elon and Grimes’ second child. It’s not known how DRAMATIC this situation is between Elon and the mothers of his kids, Shivon and Grimes. But I’ll just go ahead and point out that early in December 2021, Grimes released a song called “Player of Games” that was most likely about her relationship with Elon, which had hit the skids only two months earlier in September. So it looks like we know the name of the game Elon was playing, and it was Guess What My Dick Has Been Doing?

Pics: Patrick Pleul/DPA/Cover Images, YouTube

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