I don’t think there has ever been so much controversy surrounding a dress since the days of Monica Lewinsky, but if anyone is worthy of that kind of ridicule Kim Kardashian deserves it best. We all remember her thirsty stunt queen antics when she stuffed her bits into Marilyn Monroe‘s Freakum dress at the Met Gala last month, and the backlash which followed was understandable. Dress historians were quick to blame plastic surgeons everywhere for their help in potentially ruining Marilyn’s dress. But after a meticulous investigation, the institution that lent Kim the dress in the first place, Ripley’s Believe it Or Not! Museum, says that Kim didn’t fuck up the dress.
Earlier this week photos began circulating of Marilyn’s dress allegedly looking worse for the wear after its time in Kim’s care, which we all knew was going to happen because people have been talking about this for way too long.
the back of marilyn’s jfk dress now… it feels illegal pic.twitter.com/wZHn8IIFRX
— бен (@poshdelrey) June 13, 2022
But even though many were waiting for Ripley’s to confirm that Kim destroyed Marilyn’s dress forever, People reports that they’ve come out with a statement absolving Kim of her sin and claiming that the dress was not damaged. Ripley’s originally acquired the dress in 2016, and in a 2017 report on the condition of the dress, they wrote “a number of the seams are pulled and worn. This is not surprising given how delicate the material is. There is puckering at the back by the hooks and eyes.” Then, they gave Kim the sigh of relief she had been waiting for when they explained she in fact did no further damage to the dress. They even blabbed about it in a lengthy Instagram post.
“From the bottom of the Met steps, where Kim got into the dress, to the top where it was returned, the dress was in the same condition it started in,” said Ripley’s VP of Publishing and Licensing, Amanda Joiner, who was with the dress during its journey from Orlando to New York as well as throughout the day of the Met Gala.
Ripley’s also claims that they weren’t compensated by Kim to wear the dress and she actually gave money to “two charities in the greater Orlando area” instead. And of course, by “charities” they meant the Botox and BBL Clinic of Orlando but you know, whatever. Ripley’s claims the reason they lent the dress out in the first place was for educational purposes entirely.
“Our mission is to both entertain and educate, and sparking conversations like the discourse around this dress does just that. No matter which side of the debate you are on, the historical importance of the dress has not been negated, but rather highlighted.”
All of these words sound unbelievable to me, which falls right in line with their brand I suppose. So I guess everyone’s a winner here; Kim got some attention. The public has been reminded that Ripley’s is still in business. And whatever secret check they cut to Pimp Mama Kris will never be discovered or questioned.