THE QUEEN Insisted Prince Andrew Escort Her To Prince Philip’s Memorial Service

March 29, 2022 / Posted by:

This morning THE QUEEN attended Prince Philip’s memorial service at Westminster Abbey. Because of the Queen’s recent health issues, there’d been some debate as to whether she’d make it. A royal source previously told People that she hoped to attend, but a decision would be made on the day. Well, I guess today the Queen woke up and said, “Fuck it, let’s go.” And then she opted for an extra layer of “FUCK IT” when she “insisted” on being escorted by Prince Andrew.

Yep, you read that right. The Queen arrived to the Service of Thanksgiving on the arm of Prince Andrew. People reports that she and her “disgraced second son” arrived at Westminster Abbey by car from Windsor Castle. This is the Queen’s first public event (outside of a royal residence) since her visit to Wales in October. It’s Andrew’s first since he got all his military titles and royal patronages stripped away and settled his sexual assault lawsuit with Virginia Giuffre. So it’s quite the statement, via People:

“It shows she wholeheartedly loves and believes her son,” says royal commentator Robert Jobson. “As she did when she made a statement about Camilla being Queen’s Consort, many people will now accept the Queen’s word and judgment.”

The commentator adds that there was “disquiet” among senior family members, “but she insisted”:

“It does make some sense that he accompany her because he doesn’t have a partner. A settlement has been paid but he’s guilty of nothing in the eyes of the law,” he adds. “She has faith in Andrew. Even if he disappears from public life, he’s been able to pay tribute to his father, who after all, was very proud of his service in the Royal Navy, where he fought in the Falkland Islands conflict.”

Oh shit, I forgot about that obscure royal loophole where if you fight in a ten-week war 40 years ago, you get to sexually assault underage girls!

Because the Queen is dealing with mobility issues, special arrangements were made for her arrival. Rather than come in through the main entrance, which would mean she’d have to walk the length of the aisle, she entered through the side door “with one arm on Andrew and the other on a walking cane.” As guests sang the first hymn, “O’ WTF Are You Doing, Bitch?”, the Queen and Andrew slowly but steadily walked to her seat.

When they reached the front row, the two separated, and the Queen took a seat at the end of the aisle beside Prince Charles. Beside him were Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, Princess Anne, and Anne’s husband Timothy Laurence. Prince William, Kate Middleton, and their children, Prince George and Princess Charlotte, sat behind them. Andrew’s daughters, Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie, sat in the third row with their husbands. Andrew took his seat in the front row on the other side of the aisle, beside brother Prince Edward, his wife Sophie Rhys-Jones, and their two kids:

And here’s William and Kate arriving with their children:

Prince Harry and Meghan Markle did not attend, but this was no surprise. Their spokesperson already announced the couple was not coming. This choice was likely related to Harry and Meghan losing their complimentary security detail in England. The lack of security makes them feel unsafe, and they haven’t been in the UK together since March 2020. The royal family still hasn’t met 9-month-old Lilibet. Which is too bad, cuz word on the street is she’s a real cutup.

Apparently, the Queen was actively involved in planning her late husband’s memorial and made sure to include “poignant musical selections and floral arrangements” inspired by her and Philip’s 1947 wedding. Throughout the service, she managed to stand up to pray and sing anthems. The congregation sang a hymn that was chosen by Prince Philip to be sung at his funeral. Due to COVID-19 restrictions last year, Philip’s original 30-guest funeral didn’t allow singing. Or goose-stepping.

Anywho, the Queen has made her endorsement of Prince Andrew loud and clear. Armie Hammer, Chris Noth, and Marilyn Manson need to fly their asses across the pond ASAP and do a little networking: “We hear you publicly support creeps. Now, do they have to be blood-related?”


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