The U.S. Supreme Court Declined To Hear Arguments Against Bill Cosby’s Overturned Conviction
Well, it was fun while it lasted. According to Reuters, the U.S. Supreme Court has declined to intervene in the Pennsylvania Supreme Court’s decision to reverse Bill Cosby’s 2018 conviction for the sexual assault of Andrea Constand, thus assuring that Bill will likely die a free man. However, if there’s a silver lining to be seen in this decision, it’s that that could be any day now. Bill was sentenced to three to 10 years, but the devil don’t care if Bill’s evil ass is farting into a musty horsehair prison cot or a luxurious Scandinavian memory foam pillow top wrapped in organic cotton. He’s waiting in the wings rubbing his hands together in fevered anticipation as we speak ready to drag it to hell. Jesus may have let Justice fall asleep at the wheel, but Satan’s got that good connect and he and Karma are ready to PAR-TAY!
Considering that, at minimum, two sitting Justices have their own dates with the devil to look forward to, it’s not surprising that the SCOTUS rejected the prosecution’s request that they review the Pennsylvania Supreme Court’s decision to overturn his conviction. Especially considering that Bill had already served nearly three years of his sentence when he was released in June. Reuters reports:
Bill Cosby avoided renewed legal jeopardy on Monday when the U.S. Supreme Court declined to hear a bid by prosecutors to undo last year’s ruling in Pennsylvania that overturned the 84-year-old actor and comedian’s 2018 sexual assault conviction.
The justices let stand the decision by a divided Pennsylvania Supreme Court that Cosby should never have faced the charges because a previous local district attorney had publicly promised in 2005 not to prosecute him, turning away an appeal by prosecutors. The state court’s ruling freed Cosby after he spent nearly three years in state prison, angering sexual assault victims and their advocates.
Naturally, even though his guilt is written all over his face (take a close look, if you take a sharpie and connect all those moles and skin tags it spells GUILTY in fancy cursive), Bill sees the move by SCOTUS to literally do nothing, as a victory for the “Constitutional Rights of ALL American Citizens.” According to CNN:
In a statement on behalf of Cosby and his family, publicist Andrew Wyatt praised the justices “for following the rules of law and protecting the Constitutional Rights of ALL American Citizens.”
“Mr. Cosby’s Constitutional Rights were a ‘reprehensible bait and switch’ by Kevin Steele, Judge Steve T. O’Neill and their cohorts,” Wyatt said. “This is truly a victory for Mr. Cosby but it shows that cheating will never get you far in life and the corruption that lies within Montgomery County District’s Attorney Office has been brought to the center stage of the world.”
Mark this day. March 7 will, henceforth and in perpetuity, be forever known as William Henry Cosby Jr. Day. Just as soon as Camille Cosby gets back from the dry cleaners with his America’s Dad sweaters, he can start his campaign to get SCOTUS to make WHC Day a National Holiday. According to the AP, “despite being legally blind” Bill is ready to fight for his right stand, shoulder-to-shoulder with his fellow heroes and martyrs in the pantheon of civil rights icons. Bill’s spokesperson says “many people are calling for projects for him” and that he is “considering a final standup tour.”
Well, good for him. Bill should be fine as long as he does a clean set with no filth flying filth. He’s still got two civil lawsuits hanging over his head. It would be a shame if he said something that could be used against him in a court of law. I know two ghoulish entities who will be sitting front and center. No, not Camille and Phylicia Rashad. Satan and Karma love comedy clubs! Maybe they’ll even send him a drink. Best part — he’ll never see it coming.
Pic: YouTube