Open Post: Hosted By The $11.7 Million Pure Gold Cube Sitting In Central Park With Its Own Security

February 4, 2022 / Posted by:

On Wednesday morning, a 410-pound pure 24-karat gold cube was dropped in the middle of Central Park. My first thought was, obviously, rich bitch aliens. But it turns out the cube is an art piece by German artiste Niclas Castello. And while the artwork is not for sale, it’s valued at about $11.7 million and came with its own security team that was stationed nearby. So don’t even think about pissing on it. Or writing, “PIGEON LADY WUZ HERE.”

Here’s Niclas’ Instagram post about the cube, which is hollow on the inside and measures a mere foot-and-a-half on all sides:

After the cube squatted in Central Park for the day, it was transported to a private dinner on Wall Street, “where numerous celebrities are said to be attending.” Ooh la la! In the most bullshitty statement in the history of the world, Niclas explained that the cube is a “conceptual work of art in all its facets.” He said the idea was to “create something that is beyond our world—that is intangible.” Also, for some reason, an “accompanying cryptocurrency” is being launched alongside the physical cube, via Artnet News:

The Castello Coin, traded as $CAST, is available for purchase online at an initial price of €0.39 ($0.44) each, with an accompanying NFT auction scheduled for 21 February.

“The cube can be seen as a sort of communiqué between an emerging 21st-century cultural ecosystem based on crypto and the ancient world where gold reigned supreme,” says the Viennese gallerist Lisa Kandlhofer, who was in New York for the artwork’s launch.

That’s a lot of artsy, pretentious words to say: We ripped off Knorr Bouillon Cubes.

Pic: YouTube

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