The beef of the century is happening before our very eyes and apparently, it’s actually years in the making. Polygon says that Sesame Street‘s Elmo encountered his nemesis, Rocco The Rock, back in a 1999 episode where his fellow puppet friend, Zoe, introduced him to her “pet rock.” Zoe really has some imagination, because that rock has been pretending to do human things ever since, much to Elmo’s chagrin, as the poor guy has lost out on cookies, and job opportunities, and years of fun because of this bastard Rocco who can’t even speak. Move over Logan Paul vs. Floyd Mayweather, it’s time for Elmo and Rocco to have things out!
A clip of Elmo and Rocco’s issues is making the rounds of the Internet and a post by Twitter user Wumbooty has over 400,000 likes and has inspired a conversation. The clip features Elmo trying to get a cookie to eat, but Zoe ruins his day by suggesting that the rock should eat the last cookie, via Huffington Post:
“No, wait, Elmo. Rocco says that he wants the oatmeal raisin cookie,” Zoe says in the short clip after Elmo expresses interest in eating it.
“Rocco?!” Elmo responds. “Rocco is a rock, Zoe! Rocco won’t know the difference!”
After Zoe attempts to explain that Rocco is somehow a sentient chunk of earth with an apparent sweet tooth, Elmo goes off his rocker on the rock.
“How is Rocco going to eat that cookie, Zoe?!” Elmo yells. “Tell Elmo! Rocco doesn’t even have a mouth! Rocco’s just a rock! Rocco’s not alive!”
there are tears in my eyes y’all my stomach hurting pic.twitter.com/bbkF9yDZLf
— cheye (dr.booty) (@wumbooty) January 4, 2022
Zoe can fuck herself, eh? She’s putting Elmo through it over literally a rock! But Elmo is taking the high road, and he commented on the Rocco issues affecting his mental health through his official Twitter account:
Don't worry everybody! Elmo and Zoe practiced sharing and are still best buds forever! Elmo loves you Zoe! Ha ha ha!
Elmo doesn't want to talk about Rocco.
— Elmo (@elmo) January 5, 2022
Can’t wait for Ryan Murphy to make the next season of Feud: Sesame Street. Obviously, he’ll have to bring Jessica Lange back to his projects, though, because I don’t know who else is talented enough to give the emotional depth Rocco requires.