Open Post: Hosted By The Trailer For “The Northman” Starring Alexander Skarsgard As A Viking

December 20, 2021 / Posted by:

The Northman stars Alexander Skarsgard as a ripped AF Viking returning home to reclaim his kingdom, save his Viking Queen mother played by Nicole Kidman and get revenge on Javier Bardem for playing Desi Arnaz. Oh, wait, sorry no–getting my movies mixed up. But he is getting revenge on his uncle who betrayed his Viking King father. So it’s The Lion King but violent and with Vikings and I’m assuming no musical numbers.

Ethan Hawke, Ralph Ineson, Claes Bang, Willem Dafoe, and Anya Taylor-Joy are also in this movie, with Anya seemingly playing ASkars’ main counterpart. The official description of the movie, which was directed by Robert Eggers, calls it “an epic revenge thriller that explores how far a Viking prince will go to seek justice for his murdered father.” And if you’re wondering how epic and manly this movie is gonna be, buckle up, Ralph had this to say about Alex’s intense body transformation for the movie, via IndieWire:

“Alexander Skarsgård looks like an absolute beast. [There’s] a scene where he beats this guy in a battle; bends down and rips his throat out with his teeth, screams to the gods and he’s got his shirt off – and you think: “My god that’s not a bodybuilder doing a scene, that’s like a proper serious actor!” He’s made himself look like some kind of monster for the part, the dedication’s incredible. I think it will be a bit of a masterpiece, to be honest.”

A “masterpiece?” I know when I see a movie where someone’s throat is ripped out with a man’s teeth I think: “Oscar bait!” The trailer features a young Alex escaping his home as his father (played by Ethan) gets beheaded. He returns as an adult to get revenge. Here’s the trailer:

I mean, I’m going to watch this. Not because I want to see it necessarily, but didn’t you notice the most important casting choice?! Björk! And she’s playing some kind of witch called Seeress! SOLD!

And I hope ASkars’ character also gets revenge on whoever put that wig on Nicole’s head.

Pic: YouTube

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