Last night, Kathy Griffin went on Jimmy Kimmel Live! and shared some very happy news: she’s cancer-free! 61-year-old Kathy was diagnosed with stage 1 lung cancer in August. The doctors immediately did surgery to remove Kathy’s tumor, but another scan revealed they missed some. So they went back in and removed half her left lung! Kathy seems to be doing okay, but an intubation tube fucked with her vocal cords, so she’s (temporarily) speaking with a high, breathy voice, which she describes as “Minnie Mouse meets Marilyn Monroe.” Move over ScarJo, there’s a new raspy-voiced sex symbol in town!
Jimmy Kimmel asked Kathy if the doctors had gotten all the cancer out, and she happily replied, “I’m cancer-free!” as the audience cheered and applauded. She said, via People:
“I had surgery, you’re not going to believe this — so, I’ve never smoked but I got lung cancer. In August, I had half of my left lung removed,” I’m not even kidding,” she told Kimmel, 54, before explaining that her voice was temporarily altered by an intubation tube affecting her vocal cord.
Kathy says her new voice is only temporary:
“It will heal, but I’m sort of enjoying it. I’m a good two octaves higher, I think,” she said, before joking, “It’s higher than Mariah Carey, I know that.”
When Kimmel asked, “Did the doctors get it all? They got all the lung cancer out of there?” Griffin confirmed that her tumor had been fully removed.
She went on to explain how she got half her lung removed:
“Yes! So I’m cancer free,” she said. “I don’t know why, I had a tumor, right? And I’ve never smoked, and it was in there for 10 years. So get this, they took it out, and they found it on another scan. So I go in, and here’s the thing: when you’re a comic, it’s horrible when the doctors want to do their material on you.”
Griffin explained, “So I go in, and he’s describing how they take half your lung out, and he goes, ‘It’s kind of like a balloon. So we do it laparoscopically and we poke it.’ And then he goes, ‘And when we take it out, it kind of looks like a used condom.’ And then he goes, ‘You can use that.’ “
Kathy also talked about “slowly being uncancelled” after she was vilified for that bloody Trump mask picture. She’ll appear on the upcoming fifth season of Search Party as a crazy conspiracy theorist. Fun!
Here’s Kathy’s interview:
Well, good for Kathy! Uncancelled and uncancered!
Before I go, I must share with you the following anecdote: as I was writing this post, my boyfriend strolled over, spotted Kathy’s picture on my laptop, and said these exact words: “She doesn’t look anything like her daughter. You know, the girl from those Fifty Shades movies.” That’s right. This bitch thought Kathy Griffin was Melanie Griffith. And now my mind is living in an alternate reality where Kathy starred in Working Girl and married Antonio Banderas! Sigh. What could have been…