Jean-Claude Van Damme Unintentionally Provided A Distraction For A Multi-Million Dollar Jewel Heist

July 29, 2021 / Posted by:

What does former action star Jean-Claude Van Damme have to do with a jewel heist? A lot apparently. French police have arrested suspects who are alleged to have swiped millions of dollars worth of precious jewels and gems. And a big reason why the thieves were able to get away with the jewels in the first place is because people were so stunned by the star power of JCVD that they didn’t even notice the knife-wielding robbery.

The Guardian says that on Tuesday, CCTV cameras caught the suspect entering Chaumet jewelers near the Champs-Élysées. While inside, the suspect allegedly pulled a knife on the staff after looking around a bit and robbed the place.

CCTV shows the alleged thief, grey-haired and wearing a light-grey suit, white shirt and tie, arriving at the store about 5.10pm on Tuesday. Shortly afterwards he was filmed leaving the shop with a white bag of jewels and gemstones and departing on a green scooter that he had left parked outside. Staff told police the lone man had at first pretended to be a customer asking to see various pieces of expensive jewellery before drawing a knife. No one was injured in the robbery.

The suspect made his escape on an electric scooter. Badass–Fast and the Furious, who? This store has been robbed before. They got hit in 2009 when €1.9 million ($2.25 million US) worth of jewels were taken. This time they were robbed for even more!  A policeman told Le Parisien that this was a “monumental” haul. This thief made off with between €2m ($2.96 million US) and €3m ($3.56 million US) worth of stuff. But CCTV catches thieves everywhere, and yesterday the French police arrested two suspects traveling by coach in Moselle, France. Police have said that a “substantial part” of the stolen jewels were recovered, and were questioning the two suspects–one mid-50s and one mid-40s. No other details about the arrests were given.

Jeanne d’Hauteserre, the mayor of Paris’s 8th arrondissement, where the robbery happened, called it “mind-boggling, daring, unprecedented and regrettable.” Now for the hilarious part. So with all this out in the open thievery, you’d wonder–how did no one see this and stop it at the moment? Well, there’s a great explanation for that, and it involves Jean Claude Van Damme being so goddamn star-striking!

After the heist, potential witnesses at a nearby cafe told Le Parisien they saw and heard nothing. Many were reportedly distracted by the presence of one-time screen hard man and martial arts specialist Jean-Claude Van Damme at the nearby opticians.

OPTICIANS! He was at an appointment and still, the people of France were so distracted by him they didn’t witness a multi-million-dollar heist.

Here’s hoping that those French police are really questioning those two suspects. How do we know Jean-Claude wasn’t in on it? Is this Ocean’s 8 come to life and a famous person helped a jewel heist????!???? Get to the bottom of it!

Pic: Wenn.com

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