Have ya heard? Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton got married! Cuz they’re in love! And they love showing us their love! And it’s gross! Please stop! On the last episode of “Blake + Gwen = Puke Emoji,” the newlyweds performed an acoustic set at Blake’s restaurant in Oklahoma. Blake introduced his wife using her maiden name, and she replied, “I thought it was Gwen Shelton now!” Then, this past Tuesday night, Gwen showed up for a surprise duet with Blake at CMA’s Summer Jam event in Nashville. Blake initially introduced his wife as “Gwen Stefani”, but halfway through the song he corrected himself and referred to her as, “Gwen Stefani… Shelton!” Sigh. What a shame. “Gwen Stefani” is my second favorite pop star name. #1 is obviously “Dua Lipa”.
Here’s the couple singing “Happy Anywhere,” their milquetoast country love duet. “Gwen Stefani… Shelton!” is around 1:36:
After the performance Gwen posted this picture to Instagram and teased Blake for not taking a picture with her and her cute bridal outfit (featuring her latest signature look: a ponytail dipped in an octopus’ butt):
Gwen’s social media pages still show her usual name of Gwen Stefani. So is Gwen actually gonna change her name, or is this “Stefani… Shelton!” shit just an onstage gimmick to appease conservative country fans? If it’s the latter, Gwen should really go all in for their next duet. She got the memo about cowboy boots, now it’s time to add pigtails, Daisy Dukes, and a MAGA hat. Hell, it ain’t that much of a leap. She already admitted she isn’t a feminist…