Today is Kourtney Kardashian‘s 42nd birthday, and her current piece, Travis Barker, 45, surprised her yesterday with gigantic displays of her favorite tulips and gardenias that look like Sigmund the Sea Monster went full Chia Pet after ransacking the garden aisle at Home Depot and stealing the crib mobiles of a dozen babies headed for a career in horticulture.
I’m sure Kourtney was more appreciative of the grand gesture than this description may suggest, but tastefully restrained aesthetics aren’t really Travis’s thing, as we already know from the frothing volcanic ink splooge that covers his body; including his latest excellent choice of Kourtney’s name on a delicate parcel of chesticle, because tattoed names of your current fuckpiece always work out well.
via E! Online:
On Saturday, April 17, a day before she celebrates her 42nd birthday, Kourtney Kardashian posted on her Instagram Story a video showing an enormous and extravagant arrangement of at least white 200 tulips displayed on a floor in her house and resting underneath a hanging installation of other white flowers. She tagged her boyfriend Travis Barker in the clip, adding a black heart.
The Blink-182 drummer later reposted the video, which features SZA’s emotional song “Quicksand,” whose lyrics deal with relationship insecurity.
Kourtney and Travis, 45, began dating in December 2020 following years of sporadic romance rumors. They made their relationship Instagram official in February, just after Valentine’s Day.
“He is a great boyfriend and really treats her well,” a source close to Kourtney told E! News in March. “He showers her with gifts and compliments. She’s enjoying it. It’s very easy to date him because they have known each other for so long. He was always into her and it finally happened.”
It’s a pretty safe bet that the “source close to Kourtney” is none other than Pimp Mama Kris, hell-bent as usual to spin the oldest horses in her massively exploited freak show of a stable as the finest of mature cheeses too sexy for their rinds.
Last week, Travis led up to the grand botanical gesture by making all of us picture the two of them rubbing their bits against each other like crispy, chafing flesh on a hot summer day:
And here are Sigmund and the crib mobiles in full bloom:
Let it be a lesson to all of us, never to underestimate the power of frisky, middle-aged love!