I know none of us know what to expect anymore, but I will say that I REALLY didn’t expect that three weeks into 2021 I’d be writing: Russell Crowe gets into an internet fight over the 2003 historical sea epic Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World. I mean, a fight on the internet? Russell Crowe has gone soft. But most of Russell’s fighting is done on Twitter these days. But back to this fight over Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World, and how it’s only booooooring if you have the attention span of a child, at least according to Russell Crowe himself.
I have never seen 2003’s Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World. And I’m only really familiar with it because I know it’s definitely not a film adaptation of Gary Larson’s The Far Side comics. It’s a water-based ship film set in the Napoleon era, starring Russell Crowe as Captain Jack Aubrey, the titular master-slash-commander. It was based on a series of novels published in the 20th century, and it was nominated for 10 Academy Awards, winning two (Best Cinematography and Best Sound Editing). It’s also more than 2 hours long, and all of that is set at sea on a ship. So if you’re anything like me, and you need a lot of sex, jewelry, and Celine Dion to keep you interested in more than 2 hours of antique water-based boat drama, well – this movie might not be for you.
It also wasn’t for a UK film critic named Ian McNabb, who suggested two weeks ago on Twitter that if anyone is having trouble sleeping, they should throw Master and Commander up on the TV. Thanks, but I’ll stick with my Theraflu and stress exhaustion. Ian implied that the story was so boring and the pacing was so slow, that even the most hardcore insomniac would be sawing logs. That enthusiastic recommendation got back to Russell, who argued the film is brilliant, not boring, and that it’s a movie for “adults.”
That’s the problem with kids these days.
Peter Weirs film is brilliant. An exacting, detail oriented, epic tale of fidelity to Empire & service, regardless of the cost.
Incredible cinematography by Russell Boyd & a majestic soundtrack.
Definitely an adults movie. https://t.co/22yjNtQRbg
— Russell Crowe (@russellcrowe) January 17, 2021
The only problem with Russell’s argument is that 56-year-old Russell is allegedly four years younger than the “kid” he was dragging:
Thanks Russell. I'm 60 but I get your point. Love Unhinged. Greetings from Liverpool, I.
— Ian McNabb (@empiresend) January 17, 2021
HuffPo points out that many people jumped to Russell’s defense, saying that Master and Commander is a great film, and is definitely not boring and that the film’s director Peter Weir isn’t exactly a snoozy dud-maker (Peter directed Picnic at Hanging Rock, Dead Poets Society, and The Truman Show).
Movies are so subjective, and I know plenty of people who can stay awake for hours listening to people holler about helming the starboard and jibbing the mainsail. So I have to disagree with Ian’s joke. Besides, if you really want to fall asleep with help from Russell Crowe, just cue up his scenes from Les Miserables. Your body will immediately pass out to prevent you from listening to his singing.
Pic: 20th Century Fox