Today In Choo-Choo News: Lil Wayne Has Boarded The Trump Train

October 30, 2020 / Posted by:

Well this is shocking. Who could have imagined that a universally revered and respected man who’s dedicated his life and career to selflessly fighting for civil rights and justice, sacrificing his own financial well-being in the process, and literally putting his life on the line is pursuit of these noble principals such as (*checks notes*) Lil Wayne, has endorsed Donald Trump. I can hear John Lewis now, wherever he may be – “WHHAT?!” Oh, wait sorry, that was Lil Jon. John Lewis is resting in power and wants nothing to do with this mess.

Here’s Lil Wayne showing his support for Donald Trump and receiving the customary white women welcome promised to all who do the same.

According to Entertainment Weekly, Lil Wayne’s support is based on Donald’s “Platinum Plan” for Black Americans.

The rapper was referring to the Trump administration’s proposed $500 billion package aimed at creating capital, jobs, and opportunities for the Black community. Some critics have accused the plan of being high on promises and low on actual details.

Maybe Lil Wayne thought the Platinum Plan actually came with a “platinum” watch. He’s going to be mighty disappointed when it turns his wrist green. And wait until he finds out that the Sizzurp maker (AKA the Lean Machine) he was promised is full of bees! But for now, Donald continues to corner the coveted Black male rapper (35-55) demographic which will surely sway tens of undecided dusty men to follow suit and vote for him. Lil Wayne joins Lil Pump (who received his promised white woman welcome last week after he gave a rousing expletive filled endorsement on Instagram) and…well that’s all right now for actual endorsements (Lil Xan could not be reached for comment).

Rappers Lil Pump and 50 Cent previously endorsed Trump because of his tax policy, but the latter changed has apparently changed his mind.

While Ice Cube has not explicitly endorsed Trump, the rapper also recently met with Trump officials about the Platinum Plan.

Because of Ice Cube and 50’s tacit and retracted endorsements (respectively), they have been relegated to receiving the far less coveted Toothy Black Patriot welcome that comes free with any mention of Donald Trump that isn’t an explicit rejection.

Per the Platinum Plan’s fine print, Kanye West will still receive this benefit until 2024 when he runs for president on the Democratic ticket as he has suggested he might, or until Donald Trump is locked up in prison, whichever comes first.


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