Prince Andrew Is Reportedly Being Erased From Prince Philip’s 100th Birthday Celebrations

September 14, 2020 / Posted by:

Queen Elizabeth’s husband Prince Philip is scheduled to turn 100 years old on June 21, 2021. So they’re throwing him a big 100th birthday party, even if Philip looks like the type who would rather just stay home, drink a scotch, and cuss someone out for putting too many chives in his cottage pie. Philip’s birthday celebrations are nine months away, and there’s lots to do beforehand, including some pre-party damage control. And not the regular kind, like making sure Philip doesn’t have access to a live mic, or tried to drive himself into the party. This has to do with the Royal Family’s current biggest publicity stain, Prince Andrew.

A source tells The Sun that Prince Andrew is being given the ANTM end-of-episode disappearing treatment. Which is to say, the Royal Family is trying to cut Prince Andrew out of the festivities as much as possible. Philip’s birthday party will include several major events, as well as a large photo exhibition honoring his life. The source says that organizers of the photo exhibit have been told that there are to be no pictures of Andrew and his pops. And it’s not because Andrew has a tendency to look absolutely goofy in 98% of the pictures that are taken of him. It’s because the only people who want to see Andrew’s face at this point are the FBI. Andrew is still (allegedly) dodging accountability for his alleged role in Jeffrey Epstein’s underage sex trafficking ring. He’s been hit with numerous accusations of rape and misconduct. The FBI still wants to talk to Andrew about his maybe-friend Ghislaine Maxwell, who is currently in jail while waiting for her sex trafficking trial to start. The source says:

“There is a warning from up high to play down Andrew. He will be included as little as possible. It’s not whitewashing history because you can’t leave him out entirely. But it will not make a big deal of his relationship with the Duke of Edinburgh over the years.”

It’s true, you can’t make him disappear completely, but they can control how the public might react. And it’s clear the Royal Family would rather people walk through that exhibit and jokingly wonder, “Where oh where is Andrew?“, as opposed to seeing Andrew in pics and gag, “Ew, that CREEP.” Which is why he’s not going to be in any of the pictures. Kind of like what they did with Princess Bea’s wedding pictures from earlier this summer, in which Andrew didn’t appear in any of the ones released to the public. The source says that Andrew also won’t be allowed to write an introduction about his dear ol’ dad in the photo exhibit program. That will likely be covered by Philip’s other kids, Charles, Princess Anne, or the Jan Brady of the family, Prince Edward. Or, maybe one of Philip’s grandkids, like the future-future King, Prince William.

It’s not known if Andrew will be uninvited to Philip’s birthday celebrations, or if he’ll just be forced to celebrate in a smaller, less cute room with a sad, deflated balloon, where no one but an underpaid butler will make eye contact with him. So, sort of like Andrew’s own 60th birthday from this year. But royal organizers better figure it out soon, because 2021 and 2022 has a couple events that will make them awkwardly wonder who will be the first to address the creepy elephant in the room (you know, provided Andrew is invited). Not only does Philip turn 100, but Queen Elizabeth turns 95 next April. In February 2022, The Queen will celebrate her Platinum Jubilee, which honors a reign of 70 years. If the rumors about Andrew being Queen Elizabeth’s favorite kid are true, then he should at least be allowed to make a speech at his mum’s jubilee. After all, he owes a great deal of thanks to the woman who has successfully kept him out of handcuffs for so long!


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