Chris Evans trended at #1 on Twitter all day yesterday, because if the internet runs on dick pics, it overloads and combusts over a shadowy, dark-ass pic of a dick that may or may not belong to Chris Evans.
While playing a game of Heads Up––which has an entirely new meaning now––with his friends, Chris Evans whipped out his…cell phone and started filming his friends stumbling through an easy answer. And yesterday, he uploaded the clip to his Instagram Stories and went full “middle-aged dad not knowing how technology works” when he accidentally included a shot of his camera roll. And on that camera roll was a dark picture of a dick, which caused a flood that temporarily quenched the thirst of the chronically dehydrated on Twitter.
According to Page Six, the video was immediately deleted from Chris’ Instagram stories, but because screenshots exist, it made its way around the internet, far and wide. But it brought up questions like: Was it even Chris’ dick? (Although, what guy only takes ONE dick pic? You usually need to get at least a good five or six…hundred). Also on that camera roll was a picture of Chris with the caption “Guard That Pussy” written underneath. So if you’ve got a coochie, you can put a “Guarded By Captain America” sign over it.
Because the dick pic share was an accident and Chris quickly deleted it, many say that sharing the pic is a violation and reported the tweets showing the dick pic, which landed some Twitter users in Twitter Jail. But of course, it still turned into a meme:
the marvel cast watching chris evans’ instagram story this morning pic.twitter.com/UpmFDXOzkb
— 𝓪𝓁𝒾𝒶𝓈 (@itsjustanx) September 12, 2020
me finding out why chris evans is trending pic.twitter.com/5pE6xw26lc
— Gabe 🏳️🌈 🌿 (@gabedoesart) September 12, 2020
Chris Evans tripped omg I hope he’s ok :(( pic.twitter.com/g1iDvCk5BA
— JΛMIΛ⁷ (@rmvhopee) September 12, 2020
Even his ‘Avengers’ co-star, Mark Ruffalo, commented on the controversy with the most accurate of statements:
.@ChrisEvans Bro, while Trump is in office there is NOTHING you could possibly do to embarrass yourself. See… silver lining.
— Mark Ruffalo (@MarkRuffalo) September 13, 2020
And Chris’ brother Scott Evans joked about it today:
Was off social media for the day yesterday.
What’d I miss?
— Scott Evans (@thescottevans) September 13, 2020
And Chrissy Teigen, Twitter commenter of everything, piped in, suggesting that maybe the dick pic was not of Captain America’s liberty crotch torch. Um, if Chris Evans and his friends have a WhatsApp chain of dick pics, how the hell do I get on that chain?
My WhatsApp automatically saves every photo to my roll so any boobs in my phone are my girlfriends showing me their boobs or boobs they hate or boobs they love or yeah def also my boobs. I’d say 80 percent of my roll is whatsapp nonsense between friends
— chrissy teigen (@chrissyteigen) September 13, 2020
Chris, needless to say, has not spoken about the situation. But his fans are helping him out by trying to push out the dick pic with pics of Chris’ dog Dodger:
— Leah (@letinaudience) September 12, 2020
In those two top pics, Dodger is definitely thinking, “Will you mad bitches stop screaming over getting Rick-Rolled Dick-Rolled with pics of me. I’m trying to take a nap on your man over here.”