David Blaine’s First Live Stunt In Nearly 10 Years Will Be To Float Around By A Bunch Of Balloons

August 14, 2020 / Posted by:

While the Up grandpa’s lawyers start working on an intellectual property lawsuit, we’re learning that David Blaine is preparing to fly high over the sky in the name of helium-inflated spherical magic! This will be David’s first stunt in almost ten years and will involve him hanging from a bunch of balloons. And much like all of David’s stunts, this one’s dangerous enough to put his life at risk.

Entertainment Weekly reports that David announced his latest attempt at cheating death a few days ago. David has partnered with YouTube, who will broadcast his latest project, titled Ascension. The live event will begin in New Jersey on Monday, August 31st, where David will take social distancing to the extreme by flying away from everyone while tethered only to balloons, across the New York skyline. Here’s the trailer, which doesn’t really tell you much. Except this trailer did remind me of the existence of David Blaine’s brand logo, which looks like something that should be embroidered on the ass pocket of a pair of jeans from 2004.

David also tweeted about the event, saying that the purpose is to turn “worry into wonder,” and to “take magic to new heights.” David, I hate to break it to you, but Ascension is just going to cause more worry. Because all it’s going to do is give you a better view of all the people who aren’t wearing masks.

And here’s a better view of his balloon set up. It’s really too bad David couldn’t have called up the Kardashians and asked to reuse one of their giant inflatable heads. Think of the environment.

David’s past stunts have included:

– Buring himself alive for a week in 1999
– Freezing himself into a block of ice for 63 hours in 2000
– Standing on a 100-foot pillar for 35 hours in 2002
– Living in a suspended glass bock over the Thames River with no food for 44 days in 2003
– Living in a “human aquarium” for 7 days while breathing oxygen through a tube in 2006
– Being shacked to a spinning gyroscope for 52 hours without food or water in 2006
– Hanging upside down without a safety net for 60 hours in 2008
– Standing on a pillar surrounded by live electrical coils for 72 hours in 2012

Usually, David’s stunts involve standing somewhere for a long time, or being stuck inside something for a long time. And every time, there’s been an audience close by. But for the first time in his career, he’s got an entertaining stunt, and a great way to get out of a conversation. I can’t think of a more perfect way to avoid answering questions about his sexual misconduct allegations, than by grabbing some balloons and disappearing into the clouds.

Pic: Wenn.com

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