Kanye West Pretty Much Admits That His Presidential Campaign Is Designed To Hurt Joe Biden’s Chances
Kanye West is supposed to be focusing on Operation: Save His Shit Marriage in an “island fortress” somewhere in the Dominican Republican, but I guess Pimp Mama Kris’ Zoom call presentation, where she uses storyboards to show how they can stretch out the inevitable KimYe divorce for maximum attention and profits, doesn’t take all day. Because Kanye managed to pull himself away for a minute to talk to his good friends at Forbes about how the Donald Trump campaign is helping him get on the ballot in certain states. That move makes it look like Kanye2020 is a reboot of JillStein2016, and he didn’t deny that, but he later tweeted that his goal is to win it all. So basically he’s Amber Rose’s three fingers and the presidential race is his booty hole because he’s all the way in.
Kanye West will be on the ballot in Oklahoma, Vermont, and Colorado. Kanye missed the ballot deadline on many, many states and he pulled his petition in New Jersey after an election official alleged that 600 of the 1,327 signatures on his petition were forged. Kanye is running as an independent under some shit called The Birthday Party (yes, it’s Kanye’s party and we’re all crying because we have to), but several Republicans are helping Kanye including a lawyer who works on the Trump campaign and is working to get Kanye on the ballot in Wisconsin. Forbes’ writer Randall Lane let Kanye know that the chances of him becoming POTUS are about as slim as Kylie Jenner’s original lips and so his campaign is a tool to snatch votes away from Joe Biden. Even Kanye couldn’t disagree with that:
Asked about that directly, West said that rather than running for president, he was “walking,” quickly adding that he was “walking . . . to win.”
When it was pointed out that he actually can’t win in 2020—that he won’t be on enough ballots to yield 270 electoral votes, and that a write-in campaign isn’t feasible—and thus was serving as a spoiler, West replied: “I’m not going to argue with you. Jesus is King.”
“Err, since I’m your King, I command you to stop the fuckery,” said Jesus in an official statement.
Kanye wouldn’t directly answer questions about working with the GOP, but he did burp out a threat to make the US education system worse:
West rebuffed various attempts to clarify who was driving his ballot access or strategy and whether it’s being coordinated by or with Republican-affiliated officials. He does, however, appear to have a continuing relationship with the Trump White House. West says that he’s “designing a school within the next month” and that “I’m meeting with Betsy DeVos about the post-Covid curriculum.” (The Secretary of Education’s press office hadn’t responded to a request for comment by the time we published.)
And after Forbes published their latest Kanye story, he let us know that he’s still wishing for the impossible:
THE GOAL IS TO WIN
— ye (@kanyewest) August 7, 2020
As for Kanye trying to fuck with Biden’s chances, earlier polls showed the opposite with Kanye taking support away from Trump. And David Jackson, a political science professor at Bowling Green State University, told AP that if Republicans think that Kanye will take away some of the youngin’ vote from Biden, studies show that’s not happening:
But African Americans tend not to vote for candidates solely because they are Black, while West’s status with Americans age 18 to 29 is actually more unfavorable than favorable, Jackson said. That means Republicans working to ensure he competes with Biden may not be able to peel many of their target voters away from the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee.
“It proves that people from the opposite party really know nothing about the appeal of the other party,” Jackson said.
Well, if Kanye is the Jill Stein of 2020, brace yourselves for the image of Susan Sarandon holding hands with Kanye at one of his rallies while orgasming on the inside over another possible “revolution.” So what I’m saying is to get yourself some heavy-duty acoustic foam and shove them into your earholes, because if Susan endorses Kanye, her nemesis Debra Messing will let out an extra-strength scream of rage that will destroy every pair of eardrums in its path.