The Bold and The Beautiful is going to return to production in Los Angeles this week, but don’t worry there are precautions in place including the sex scenes. Since they do not have the budget to fuck-ify scenes with help from CGI, like Hollywood movies are reportedly doing, they are bringing in the partners of the actors and dolls. And just like that, the restaurant filler blow-up dolls in South Carolina have taken a Greyhound bus to Hollywood to make it in the soap opera business! They’re going to clean up at the Daytime Emmys next year.
Forbes says that when filming on B&B starts up again today, making it the first US TV series to start production, they will enforce social distancing including the social distancing of crotches. Bradley Bell, the executive producer, said that they tried cutting out all the kissing scenes but it made the show awful:
“We were cutting all of the kisses, and the shows weren’t the same.”
Sex must sell. B&B earned $8 million in ad revenue in the first quarter of 2020 and last year brought in $36 million. The description of how they decided to work-around kissing during coronavirus sounds insane. I can’t wait to see it. Forbes described:
Preserving those passionate on-screen kisses will involve a bit of creative camera work, and the magic of editing. Each actor will go through the motions separately, performing inches away from the camera.
“They’ll look like they’re nose to nose, in the throes of passion. But they’ll be shooting scenes all by themselves.”
That… is going to look like a person making out with a camera. I don’t understand how it’s going to look like anything else. In Love With A Rollercoaster lady meet In Love With A Camera people.
As for the sex scenes, they’re using blow-up dolls and probably the ones they’ve used in the past to throw down some stairs, drown, and push out of windows. Those dolls are haunted. And the partners of actors will be brought in for love scenes that “involve touching.” The partners will be tested for COVID-19 beforehand. But what love scene does not involve touching? Bradley explained the dolls like this:
“We have some life-like blow up dolls that have been sitting around here for the past 15 years, that we’ve used for various other stories—(like) when people were presumed dead. We’re dusting off the dolls and putting new wigs and make-up on them and they’ll be featured in love scenes.”
There are tons of new protocols for filming and a new coordinator will be on set to oversee the safety precautions:
“I’m in the parking lot now, reviewing protocols. We plan to get our first shots tomorrow, and Thursday and Friday we’ll roll into full production. Of course, if there are any red flags or concerns, we’ll stop. Because safety is first.”
I love that B&B is not going to skimp on the sex. They know how horny everyone is after quarantine. Hopefully, the dolls didn’t gain sentience while being locked away, but if they did maybe the new wigs and makeup will satiate their rage.