Nathan’s Annual 4th Of July Hot Dog Eating Contest Will Go On Without An Audience

June 16, 2020 / Posted by:

We all know the saying, the show must go on, but maybe, sometimes, it’s OK if it doesn’t. Like for example, if said show necessitates the placement of barf buckets in multiple locations and involves the participants unhinging their jaws to gobble down as many frankfurters as possible during a time when the nation is staring down the barrel of a second wave of a global pandemic in which a potentially deadly virus is spread through saliva. Maybe it’s okay to cancel it. Just this one time (if not cancelled in perpetuity because it’s absurd and disgusting to me personally). But nah.

According to TMZ, the annual tradition of showing starving kids in America and around the world the true meaning of liberty, Nathan’s Annual 4th of July Hot Dog Eating Contest, will go on. But there won’t be an audience. If reigning champion (74 wienies in 10 minutes) Joey Chestnut’s stomach explodes, spraying blood, guts, bile, and sopping wet hot dog buns everywhere, and there’s no one there to see it, does it make a sound? Well, I guess we’re going to find out!

COVID-19 can’t stop one of America’s biggest 4th of July traditions from happening … ’cause the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest WILL go down this year … but with some major changes.

TMZ Sports has learned … the event is set to take place at a private location without fans in 2020 … and will feature 1/3 of the competitors to ensure social distancing.

The hot dog eating contest usually draws thousands of fans at Surf and Stillwell Avenues on Coney Island each year … but given the global pandemic, it’s all gonna be behind closed doors.

We’re told all staffers will be wearing masks and gloves, and all eaters will be tested for COVID-19 prior to the showdown … and the location will be sanitized to the max.

TimeOut New York adds that the location is being kept a secret to ward off crowds, typically “20,000 people.” Also, “In past years, people would start lining up at 8 a.m. along Stillwell and Surf Avenues for a prime seat.” I’m guessing prime seats are those in the splash zone— Gallagher is positively gagged.

However, even though there will be no audience, to the delight of sports bookies and people with gambling addictions so severe that they will bet on literally anything, the contest will air live on ESPN. I’m sure people will also be thrilled to finally get to watch the fine art of competitive eating in its purest form. Without the din of cheering crowd and the bleat of air horns, one can, at last, know the awe-inspiring sounds of multiple mandibles moistly mushing meat in a cavernous warehouse on a sweltering summer’s day. Now tell me, ain’t that America?


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